As my kids embark on another school year, I find myself reflecting on the whirlwind summer we shared. I cherished every moment we spent together, creating lasting memories amidst my work commitments. However, after the hustle of back-to-school shopping, orientation days, team meetings, and social events, I can confidently say—I’m completely drained.
Burnout is a harsh reality that many of us face at some point. The relentless pressure to juggle parenting, work responsibilities, and our own well-being can leave us feeling utterly fatigued. In today’s fast-paced world, it’s common to feel as though we need to be constantly “on.” Scrolling through social media often triggers feelings of inadequacy, as we find ourselves saying yes to every request, even when it stretches us thin.
Experiencing burnout feels like trudging through each day, merely surviving until bedtime, only to wake up and repeat the cycle. It can suck the joy from our lives, leaving us exhausted and irritable. It often leads to a foggy memory of even the simplest of tasks—like what we had for lunch. We might find ourselves agreeing to commitments out of a sense of obligation, only to later resent it, feeling trapped in the monotony of our routines.
This chaotic existence has become our “normal,” and we often voice our fatigue, frustration, and lack of time to recharge. We’ve all been there; even the so-called “experts” in mindfulness and self-care are not immune to this phenomenon.
Brené Brown, a renowned author and researcher, has spent years exploring the themes of vulnerability and burnout. She notes, “Burnout is so epidemic that it can even become our shtick.” It’s true—we often normalize our exhaustion. Brown shares a transformative piece of advice she once received: “If you don’t want to burn out, stop living like you’re on fire.” It’s a powerful reminder to reassess how we navigate our lives.
According to Brown, when she notices the signs of stress creeping in, she realizes she doesn’t like how it affects her interactions with others. “I don’t like the person I become,” she confesses, highlighting the importance of aligning our actions with our values. At the core of our struggles is the desire to feel proud of our roles as parents, partners, and friends. Slowing down can enhance our ability to fulfill these roles more effectively.
Brown suggests that when we start to feel anxious about not being busy, it’s a signal we’re seeking validation through our packed schedules. To combat this cycle, she proposes embracing the Three Dares:
- Dare to be honest about what burnout looks like for you. Recognizing your personal signs of burnout is crucial, whether it manifests as irritability or overwhelming fatigue. Awareness is the first step toward action.
- Dare to set boundaries. This advice resonated with me: “Just because I can do something does not mean I should.” We often stretch ourselves thin by convincing ourselves we can handle more. However, it’s essential to understand that saying no is a powerful act of self-care.
- Dare to create a clearing for yourself. Identify an activity that brings you joy and make it a priority. Whether it’s weekly calls with a friend, diving into a good book, or taking a leisurely walk, carving out time for yourself is vital for your well-being.
Avoiding burnout is challenging, especially when prioritizing self-care feels daunting. However, starting small and making gradual investments in your well-being can lead to significant positive changes in your life.
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In summary, acknowledging mom burnout is the first step toward reclaiming our joy and energy. By being honest with ourselves, setting firm boundaries, and allowing time for self-care, we can break free from the cycle of exhaustion and regain control over our lives.