People often ask if I ever take a break. Do I ever slow down or say “no”? How do I juggle everything? Honestly, I’m not sure. Do we ever truly have answers to these questions? We somehow navigate through our days, accomplishing what we can while setting aside what we can’t, only to pick it up again the next morning.
Finding balance in motherhood feels like an unattainable goal. It’s a constant push and pull—giving what you can while prioritizing the things that demand your attention most in the moment. Often, it feels like we’re neglecting one aspect of our lives to make room for another. We frequently believe we’re falling short, even when that’s not the case.
This struggle is intensified when anxiety is part of the equation. Imagine juggling generalized anxiety disorder alongside a spouse, three children, a demanding work schedule, and the daily responsibilities of managing a household. You’d think that would be enough to send me over the edge, and it often is. At times, I break down. I lose control. But doesn’t everyone?
Most people know when to take a step back. They recognize when it’s time to stop being the “yes” mom and start delegating more at work or asking for help at home. I’m not one of those individuals. While my body craves rest, my mind doesn’t thrive in stillness. In moments of quiet, when I finally have a chance to breathe, my anxiety floods in, crashing over me like relentless waves.
It’s overwhelming. It’s all-consuming. Childhood traumas resurface. Will I ever mend my relationship with my mother? Will my kids grow up resenting my choices? Cue the panic.
Then comes the mom guilt. I envisioned being a stay-at-home mom, dedicating my days solely to my children—no emails, no smartphones, just mud pies, park outings, and museum visits. Am I spending enough quality time with them? Are we creating lasting memories? Do they understand how deeply I care for them? Will they resent me for occasionally checking emails at the park? Cue the panic.
Relationship guilt follows closely behind. I can’t be everywhere at once. I’m just one person. Yet, I have a new niece, and I want her to know how loved she is. I want my sister to feel my support as we navigate this parenting journey together. My grandparents are important to me, too; I want them to know that. I wish to create as many memories as possible with my kids and spend quality time with my husband, whom I adore. I want to be a good friend and a supportive boss. It’s a lot to manage, and I know I’m likely failing someone somewhere. Cue the panic.
The burdens don’t stop there. I worry about student loan debt—will I ever pay it off? Housework, car maintenance, and the kids’ wellness checks loom over me. There’s a never-ending list of home projects we promised ourselves we would complete, but it remains stuck to the fridge, haunting me and causing sleepless nights as I obsess over everything waiting for another day. Cue the panic.
Living this way is far from easy. If it sounds exhausting and overwhelming, that’s because it is. I’ve always identified as an extrovert with a “go, go, go” mentality, but this goes deeper. It’s a mind that refuses to calm down. When I stop moving, I spiral into overthinking and worry. Often, it’s more exhausting to have a quiet moment than it is to find something to do, no matter how tired I feel.
Staying busy is the only way I can maintain a semblance of normalcy, but it teeters on the edge of burnout—making me short-tempered, impatient, and utterly exhausted. It shouldn’t be this way. I know it, and I’m working on it. I deserve moments of peace in my chaotic life—whether it’s enjoying a rare silence, soaking up the sun on vacation, or indulging in a good book before bed—without my thoughts interrupting my relaxation.
Medications, therapy, and mindfulness techniques help, as do my friends, family, and delightful children. However, nothing completely eradicates my anxiety. I still lose sleep, and my thoughts often spiral into worst-case scenarios, even when I’m striving for positivity.
Anxiety is a daily struggle. Many people can relate to this experience. We’re starting to speak out, creating a sense of connection in the midst of our battles. I’ll keep fighting the good fight, hoping for a day when my mind finally grants me a true day off.
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Summary
Living with anxiety while managing the complexities of motherhood can feel overwhelming and exhausting. The struggle for balance often leads to feelings of guilt and self-doubt, as we try to meet the demands of family, work, and personal relationships. While staying busy can help maintain some sense of normalcy, it often leads to burnout. Acknowledging these challenges and seeking support through therapy, medication, and community can help navigate this daily battle.