“I can get the milk myself.” This phrase has become my guiding principle for marriage as we enter a new year. Managing life with young children is no easy feat. When exhaustion sets in, and the demands of parenting pull me in every direction, it’s all too tempting to glance at my partner, the one I chose from billions to navigate this chaotic journey with, and think, “Really? I’m doing it all here!”
But I know that’s not the case. Mark, my husband, is a fantastic father and companion; we just possess different strengths. Often, we aren’t even aware of the contributions each of us is making. This is where the mantra about the milk comes into play.
During our wedding ceremony, the officiant asked me to share a little about Mark and what I loved about him. She liked my story so much that she incorporated it into the ceremony. I described him as “the kind of guy who goes out for milk but returns an hour later because he took a scenic route, stopped to pick flowers for me, and even bought a book I mentioned months ago…yet forgot the milk. But that’s perfectly okay, because I can get the milk myself.”
Fast forward seven years, and we haven’t changed much. I excel at getting the milk. My organizational skills are on point, with lists upon lists and contingency plans for every scenario. Sometimes, this makes me feel like I’m the sole architect of our family’s logistics.
However, nowadays, Mark is the one who surprises me with chocolate hidden in unexpected places, takes our daughter on spontaneous adventures—though he might not always be prepared for them—and willingly soothes a fussy baby when I’ve reached my limit. He may still forget the milk, but he brings a sense of balance to our family and helps me become a better parent.
On days when I feel overwhelmed by the relentless demands of my little ones, I remind myself that I fell for an imaginative soul who can turn into any character from Frozen for hours, while our daughter plays Anna for the hundredth time. And I can get the milk myself.
At Modern Family Blog, we celebrate the unique experiences of motherhood and the multifaceted roles we play as partners, daughters, sisters, and friends. It’s important for us to have discussions beyond parenting. For more insights, you may want to explore our posts, including one about home insemination options at Make a Mom. For those seeking further information on fertility treatments, ACOG offers excellent resources.
In summary, my mantra “I can get the milk myself” serves as a reminder of the partnership I share with Mark. While we may have different approaches to parenting and life, it’s our unique contributions that make our family thrive.