According to the National Center for Victims of Crime, 1 in 5 girls will experience molestation during their childhood; I was one of them. It happened during a sleepover when I was just seven years old. We were sleeping on a pull-out couch in the living room, and the older girl encouraged me to engage in behaviors I instinctively knew were wrong. I felt scared, intimidated, and coerced; yet, I complied.
Molestation is just one form of trauma that can affect children. Other types include physical assault, witnessing violence, chronic neglect, natural disasters, accidents, war, medical trauma, the loss of a caregiver, emotional abuse, school violence, and even terrorism. The National Child Traumatic Stress Network indicates that a staggering 68% of children have encountered some form of trauma by age 16. While many do not develop PTSD, around 20% experience academic, emotional, and physical challenges that can linger into adulthood.
Those sleepovers continued, fueled by my fear of speaking out. I experienced repeated molestation by another child, an event that deepened my sense of isolation. As I withdrew from school activities, I became a target for teasing, which I found hard to cope with. My grades plummeted, and I was often in tears.
When I say trauma doesn’t disappear, I mean it. Research from the International Center for Trauma Stress Studies reveals that individuals who have experienced childhood trauma often grapple with feelings of anxiety, shame, helplessness, and anger—emotions that may not seem directly related to the traumatic event. I often feel guilty over trivial matters, like not having time to clean up the kitchen. More alarmingly, childhood trauma can lead to adults who face increased risks of anxiety, depression, substance abuse, and other relationship challenges.
In my case, the abuse triggered a latent depression that might have emerged eventually, but its onset was hastened by the trauma. This depression consumed my childhood, leaving me feeling like a shadow of myself. I struggled with self-harm and disordered eating, driven by a desire to erase my existence. Thoughts of suicide became a constant companion.
Reaching adulthood did not magically resolve my pain. Trauma does not fade away; it finds new ways to manifest. My experiences led me to believe I was unworthy of love, a notion reinforced by the lack of support from my family during my darkest moments.
The Association for Psychological Science notes that a common consequence of childhood trauma is an elevated risk of depression, a condition that can be debilitating and even fatal. Studies indicate that early-life stress can fundamentally alter the neurobiological systems associated with depression. We can’t simply “get over it.” The effects of traumatic experiences are often ingrained in our very brain structures. For instance, research shows that 75.6% of chronically depressed individuals have significant histories of childhood trauma.
Eventually, I sought help. With the aid of cognitive behavioral therapy and psychiatric medication, I found a path to healing. Treatment options for PTSD include approaches like prolonged exposure therapy, which helps individuals gradually confront trauma-related memories, and eye movement desensitization and reprocessing (EMDR), a technique endorsed by the U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs. My best friend benefited greatly from EMDR after her own traumatic experiences.
Childhood trauma is treatable, and there is hope for those of us affected. We are not destined to live lives filled with depression and relationship issues, but we must seek help, often with a nudge from a loved one—like my husband, who was my source of encouragement.
It’s crucial to remember that just because traumatic events occurred in childhood, it doesn’t mean individuals can simply “get over it.” Thousands of children today are grappling with the aftermath of natural disasters like Hurricanes Harvey and Maria, witnessing violence, and enduring abuse. These experiences leave lasting scars that alter the way they perceive the world and themselves. They need support, counseling, and resources to help them heal.
Most importantly, they need assurance and security—a nurturing environment that allows them to process what they have endured. With the right support, children can avoid becoming statistics of depression, addiction, or anxiety. They may not be able to get over their trauma alone, but with help, they can move towards a healthier future.
For those on a journey toward healing, additional resources are available, such as this excellent guide on pregnancy and home insemination, and you can also check out more insights on this critical topic.
In summary, childhood trauma is a profound issue that doesn’t simply vanish. It requires understanding, compassion, and active intervention. Healing is possible, but it begins with recognizing the reality of these experiences and supporting those who have endured them.