“This is the most delightful age,” remarked an older woman at the park, beaming at my 3-year-old daughter. I managed a polite smile in return, but inside, my thoughts were far less charitable: “Are you serious? This little one is a handful.”
When my daughter hit the milestone of 3 years, her behavior spiraled into chaos. I had always heard about the dreaded terrible twos and thought I had weathered that storm just fine—until my daughter turned 3 and reality hit. I found myself reminiscing about the relatively cute and often amusing antics of my tantrum-throwing toddler. Now, I was dealing with a full-blown “threenager,” and it quickly became clear why this term exists. I wanted to shake those who assured me that 2 was the toughest year. They were mistaken.
If you’re navigating this tumultuous phase like I am, you might find my insights helpful. Here are some common questions parents often ask, along with my honest answers.
Why are 3-Year-Olds So Challenging?
Why is the ocean blue? Why do we have seasons? The answer to why 3-year-olds can be so challenging is as elusive as these questions. A child psychologist might provide a scientific explanation for this developmental stage, but all I can do is warn you about the wild ride you’re about to embark on. Brace yourself for some serious upheaval.
Not too long ago, I was relaxing on my couch, absorbed in an article, when my daughter charged at me like a linebacker bursting through a banner. I jumped, spilling coffee all over myself and uttering a few choice words. And what did she do? She laughed. Yes, she found it hilarious that I was now a coffee-stained mess. Despite my best efforts to curb this behavior, it’s become a Sunday morning tradition. Reading the newspaper with coffee is now a thing of the past.
What Drives a 3-Year-Old?
The singular mission of a 3-year-old seems to be the complete dismantling of your sanity. They have an uncanny knack for testing your limits until your patience hangs by a thread, and when they sense you’re about to crack, they push even harder. In their mischievous eyes, you can practically see the calculations they make to drive you to the edge.
While I tried to work on my laptop at the kitchen table, my daughter attempted various tactics to capture my attention—pounding on keys, shouting, and even sticking her fingers in my mouth. When those efforts failed, she resorted to digging in her nose and smearing the largest booger I’ve ever seen across my computer screen. “Look at this!” she giggled, clearly proud of her ‘artwork.’ Yes, she certainly got my attention.
How Bad Can It Get?
The month my daughter turned 3 marked a dramatic shift in her ability to listen. It seemed her goal was to challenge my sanity, right above visiting the local amusement park on her priority list. Unless I mentioned candy, superheroes, or her favorite cartoon, she was oblivious to anything I said. Typical toddler behaviors like screaming, kicking, and throwing things escalated to unprecedented levels. It’s as if they’ve declared psychological warfare as their new favorite pastime.
One of her favorite tactics involves turning simple tasks into exhausting battles. For example, getting out of the car for a doctor’s appointment can morph into a 10-minute negotiation. Recently, she begged to go outside, and as soon as I agreed and got us ready, she suddenly changed her mind. It may seem trivial, but when it happens dozens of times a day, it can feel like parental torture.
What If You Lose Your Cool?
If you find yourself snapping, the best course of action is to apologize, hug them, offer a bribe, and move forward.
Can You Survive This Phase?
Yes, it is possible to survive, but you’ll need to develop some coping strategies. Some of mine include indulging in king-sized candy bars, fizzy drinks, and comfort food from the grocery deli. This stage might seem unbearable, but I remind myself it’s just a phase like all the others in a child’s development. It will eventually pass, perhaps not as quickly as I would like, but it will pass. A seasoned parent once told me, “If she’s still acting like this at 16, let me know and we’ll seek help. Until then, just roll with it.”
So, my advice? Laugh whenever you can. Take breaks. Embrace the absurdity of it all. And for good measure, treat yourself to a few KitKats to keep your sanity intact.
Summary
The threenage years can be incredibly challenging, but with humor and patience, you can navigate this tumultuous phase. Remember, it’s just a phase, and you will emerge stronger on the other side. For more resources on parenting and family life, check out Modern Family Blog and consider exploring options like intrauterine insemination for those considering expanding their families. If you’re interested in at-home options, you can also read about the Cryobaby at-home insemination kit to find what works best for you.