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By Jessica Lane
Updated: June 8, 2020
Originally Published: April 13, 2019
Picture this: my breakup with my ex was far from dramatic. We share a child, yet his tendency to vanish—both physically and emotionally—meant that our separation ended quietly. When my daughter and I relocated across the country to start a new life with my now-husband, my ex didn’t even bother to say goodbye to her.
After we settled in, I only heard from him once in the first six months. I reached out to inform him about my upcoming marriage, but he didn’t reach out again until he got slapped with an arrest warrant for failing to pay child support for three years. By that time, I was already married, and my husband was pursuing adoption of my daughter. The only thing delayed was my ex’s signature, which he was reluctant to provide despite his clear disinterest in fatherhood. But once he got that warrant, he suddenly became responsive. I sent him the paperwork overnight, and he signed it right away, eager to free himself from financial obligations.
So, it’s amusing to see this disengaged father liking my posts on social media. First off, I don’t follow him online or in real life. My daughter has a father figure in my husband, and our family is thriving. Perhaps it’s our happiness that draws him in like a spectator.
Initially, I felt annoyed. How could he engage with my posts when he hasn’t been around for his own child? What gives him the right to intrude on my life now? But instead of blocking him, I decided to flaunt my wonderful life with my husband and daughter. I began sharing more photos of our family adventures, showcasing moments that highlighted my husband as the father my ex never was. I even shared personal updates on LinkedIn, cleverly adjusting them to suit that platform since that’s where my ex mainly interacts with my content.
And you know what? It feels great! It’s almost like I’m doing a public service. Not only is he witnessing the incredible life my daughter is missing out on, but he also has the chance to observe what it truly means to be a devoted father through my husband. Who knows, maybe he’s taking notes from afar, inspired to become a better man because of what I’m sharing.
I don’t post to provoke him; I only do it when I notice he’s been lurking on my page. It’s just a bit of fun. Given everything he put me and my daughter through (she still hasn’t received that child support), he should consider himself lucky that my social media antics are all I’m doing to him.
Is this behavior immature? Certainly. It would be healthier for me to move on entirely, right? If I’ve truly moved past our relationship, shouldn’t I let it go? Maybe, but I’ve taken the high road in every other aspect of dealing with him. For once, I wanted to indulge in a little satisfaction.
Truth be told, I was done with him long before I met my husband. Our relationship ended before my daughter was even born. His complete lack of interest when it mattered still frustrates me. Now that he’s showing curiosity about my life, his punishment is watching someone else be the father to “his” daughter. As long as he’s connected to me on social media, he’ll have no choice but to see my child thriving with a man who stepped up when he didn’t. Her achievements will be showcased online, and they won’t be due to him but instead, to the incredible man who embraced the role of her father.
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In summary, while I may be engaging with my social media in a playful manner to highlight the gap my ex has left in our lives, the real focus is on celebrating the love and commitment my husband provides to my daughter.
Keyphrase: social media revenge on ex
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