You realize you’re in the family way when…
- You find yourself asking your partner at least three times daily if you’re gaining too much weight.
- The thought of your partner suggesting you might be overdoing it sends you into a mini rage.
- You arrive at work only to have your assistant discreetly point out that your shoes don’t quite match.
- Instead of eyeing attractive strangers, you can’t help but check out strollers as if they’re the latest fashion trend.
- Every search you make on Google now includes “pregnancy” and “is this normal?”
- You develop an unusual fixation on the shade of your discharge.
- Cooking spaghetti at 8 a.m. becomes a new normal for you.
- You seriously contemplate if Dunkin’ Donuts has a loyalty program.
- You get up to use the bathroom only to realize you just went.
- You save your favorite outfit and best underwear for your OB-GYN appointments.
- You’ve memorized the location of every restroom you’ve ever visited.
- Wearing flip-flops to meetings and even church feels completely acceptable.
- While in the shower, you glance down and can’t see your vagina, prompting you to step out and check in the mirror.
- Lowering your breasts from your bra is a delicate operation due to tenderness.
- Your dog seems to look at you with a judgmental expression, as if he’s thinking, “Wow, you’ve let yourself go.”
- If one more person tells you to “get your sleep now,” you might just lose it.
- You’d choose sleep over food or intimacy any day.
- You request a recliner to replace your office chair, because comfort is key.
- You struggle to stay awake at your desk while your partner is indifferent to your plight.
- The thought of sex doesn’t appeal to you because of how swollen things feel.
- In a moment of desperation, you beg your partner for intimacy, hoping it might induce labor, and immediately regret it because you feel like a whale.
For more insights on pregnancy and home insemination, check out our post on the Cryobaby at Home Insemination Kit, which offers valuable information. If you’re curious about the best practices for home insemination, the BabyMaker Home Intracervical Insemination Syringe Kit Combo is a great resource to explore. Additionally, for a comprehensive understanding of the process, visit WebMD’s guide on IUI success, which is an excellent reference.
In summary, being pregnant brings a whirlwind of changes, both physically and emotionally. From bizarre food cravings to constant bathroom trips, it’s a unique journey filled with surprises.
Keyphrase: pregnancy signs humor
Tags: [“home insemination kit”, “home insemination syringe”, “self insemination”]