By: Emily Carter
Updated: Dec. 31, 2017
Originally Published: Dec. 31, 2017
Image Credit: Stanislaw Pytel / Getty
In today’s world, the trend of overparenting, characterized by excessive involvement and protection, tends to provoke criticism from those not engaged in it. Some argue this approach may jeopardize the future of society. A few years back, former Stanford administrator, Mark Thompson, authored a book titled How to Raise an Adult, which contends that contemporary overparenting fails to cultivate self-sufficient adults. He argues that helicopter parenting hinders even the most gifted youth—those who might attend prestigious institutions like Stanford—from acquiring the independence and life skills that were more easily developed by earlier generations. The prevailing sentiment is that in our quest to shield, support, and befriend our children, we are inadvertently impeding their growth.
While Thompson’s concerns resonate with many who reflect on the implications of overindulgent parenting, as a parent of three post-millennial children—born after 2000—I have observed this younger generation closely. Contrary to the prevailing narrative, there’s much to appreciate in these kids. Post-millennials may differ from their parents and grandparents, but they embody positive distinctions.
Post-Millenials Are Kind.
It’s true that, amidst the challenges of social media, some negativity persists; however, in elementary school settings, kindness appears to be the default. Instances of name-calling and bullying have diminished significantly. At my children’s school, playground conflicts are infrequent, and when they do occur, peers don’t cheer them on as they did in my childhood. I recently played a game of Monopoly with a group of post-millenials, and to my surprise, they allowed everyone to stay in the game, even offering free rent to those struggling. Today’s youth seem focused on minimizing harm—whether to a new student’s feelings or the environment. Perhaps it’s a reflection of modern parenting, but these kids are undeniably nice.
Post-Millenials Are Tolerant.
They exhibit a remarkable acceptance of their peers. Coming from a generation that was more critical, I find this refreshing. When my husband and I were deciding on names for our son, he dismissed my literary choices out of concern for potential bullying. Yet, it seems that children today are unfazed by names. I’ve observed that post-millenials rarely ridicule each other’s names, regardless of how unusual they may be. This subtle yet significant shift indicates a broader societal progress.
A memorable moment occurred when my fourth-grader wore his pants tucked into his black socks the entire school day. When I asked if anyone commented on his style, he simply replied, “Nope.” This generation hardly notices differences—be it regarding gender identity, family structures, or personal styles. They seem to inherently accept those around them without the need to belittle others to bolster their own self-worth.
Post-Millenials Feel Secure.
While adults may be hovering more than in past generations, this presence offers advantages. Vulnerable kids, often marginalized, feel safer in a world where adults are readily accessible. Back in the day, children learned to navigate without much supervision, which benefitted those who thrived in social hierarchies but left others exposed to negativity. Today’s adult involvement fosters a sense of fairness and provides a safety net, allowing children the freedom to grow within a secure environment.
Post-Millenials Are Empowered.
They are less intimidated by authority and more vocal than previous generations. In our social circles, it’s common for children to address adults by their first names and express their opinions candidly, creating a sense of camaraderie that might unsettle those raised with strict boundaries. However, this assertiveness has its benefits; kids today understand their rights and feel supported by the responsible adults in their lives.
Post-Millenials Are Close to Us.
The relationship between today’s youth and their parents fosters a lasting connection. Unlike my teenage years, when sharing personal experiences with parents was rare, today’s children often confide in their parents. Many young adults remain at home longer, and those who move out maintain frequent communication. While economic factors may play a role, it’s the underlying friendship that enhances family bonds. Critics may see this as a failure of modern parenting, but historically, close interdependence between parents and adult children is not novel. In fact, the trend of extreme independence seen in late 20th-century America was more of an exception.
In summary, the narrative surrounding today’s youth isn’t entirely negative. Modern parenting practices are not solely responsible for the shortcomings highlighted by critics; they also contribute positively to the qualities of the younger generation. While societal influences shape our youth, parents deserve recognition for fostering strengths such as kindness, tolerance, security, empowerment, and closeness. For a deeper dive into parenting dynamics, consider exploring related insights on boosting fertility and the success of IUI procedures.