There was a time when I meticulously styled my hair and ensured my nails were always perfectly manicured. A time when my wardrobe didn’t revolve around yoga pants, baseball caps, and well-worn cotton tees. Back then, my lingerie was matching, lacy, and definitely not something I grabbed in a last-minute rush from a big box store.
In those days, my figure was youthful and firm, and I could confidently don a bikini without a second thought. My body was toned and athletic, with no signs of the aftermath of childbirth, extra weight from sneaking fries off my kids’ plates, or the infamous post-baby belly. But those days feel like a distant memory.
In truth, it’s been longer than I’d like to admit since I was at my physical peak. I used to be confident in my skin, but now? Not so much. Nevertheless, my husband still expresses a strong desire to be intimate with me. He claims I’m just as attractive as I was when we first met, despite the evidence that says otherwise. My stretch marks and C-section scars tell a different story.
Yet, regardless of the baby weight I’ve held onto for years or the softer curves that have come with motherhood, he still pulls me close and playfully asks, “What do you think?” with the same enthusiasm as our younger days. He sees past my insecurities and recognizes the real me.
As partners, our intimacy has evolved into something deeper, rooted in years of shared experiences. While my underwear drawer may no longer resemble a catalog from a luxury brand, I’ve come to realize that the elaborate ensembles often end up discarded on the floor once the moment arrives. Nowadays, my yoga pants follow suit.
Those romantic evenings filled with candlelight have shifted to quick sessions where timing is everything—sneaking moments of passion amidst the chaos of parenting. Although the circumstances and our bodies have changed, the passion remains alive. We may now look like a typical married couple with our less-than-perfect figures, but we still find ways to connect intimately.
This isn’t to say we’ve completely let ourselves go; both of us make efforts to stay active and maintain our health. Sure, his abs have long since disappeared, and I suspect my figure will continue to shift with time. But that’s perfectly alright. We’ve embraced the concept of “bad naked” together, which is both liberating and refreshing.
Accepting our bodies as they are has paved the way for more open conversations about intimacy. I find myself enjoying our intimate moments far more, knowing I have a partner who accepts every aspect of me, including my less flattering features. He’s seen the highs and lows of motherhood and still looks at me with desire.
Yes, the days of being “good naked” may be behind us, but “bad naked” has become our reality—and honestly, it’s the best kind of naked there is. If you want to explore more about fertility journeys, check out our post on couples’ fertility journey. For those interested in pregnancy and home insemination, this resource is also worth a read. And for further insights on this topic, visit Modern Family Blog.
In summary, while our bodies may have changed significantly over the years, the love and desire between my husband and me remain strong. We have embraced our evolving selves, finding joy and intimacy in our new normal.