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On our tenth wedding anniversary, I pulled out some old pictures of my partner and me from storage to share with our kids. I want them to know that we existed as individuals before taking on the roles of Mom and Dad. One particular photograph brings a smile to my face — it captures our first big trip together, just two years after we met: ten days in Mexico, journeying by bus from Mexico City to La Costa Esmeralda, and then to Oaxaca to meet friends. The image, printed on low-quality photo paper, has a date stamped in the corner: 9/10/2009. It shows us at the beach in Veracruz, where a photographer roamed around offering to take and print pictures. I wanted a keepsake. We were facing west, basking in the warm, golden hour light just before sunset, with the waves lapping at our ankles.
The photo is humorously overexposed. My skin glows bronze — almost like polished metal — while my partner’s pale chest appears ghostly, lacking any definition. We laughed heartily when we first saw it; it looked like I was on holiday with a spirit. I showed it to my children, thinking they would share in the humor.
Instead, my daughter Mia glanced at it and asked, “Mom, did you get fat?”
In that moment, I felt a rush of embarrassment and wanted to vanish into the mattress beneath us. I had only a moment to respond.
“Yes,” I replied.
Mia nodded, “Yeah, Mom, your tummy is really fat.”
“Indeed,” I said, trying to sound unfazed. “Bodies change; sometimes they grow larger, sometimes smaller. What truly matters is that our bodies keep us alive. I think mine is doing pretty well.” I know this is true, but I also realize that I am reminding myself. Can they sense that?
“Mom’s absolutely right,” chimed in my partner, Jake. I appreciated his support even as I felt a twinge of jealousy over his lean physique, which hasn’t changed since we first met.
“Yeah, you definitely got fatter,” Mia reiterated. “But I like your fat belly because it’s soft and kind of like a pillow.”
A part of me wanted to feel embarrassed, but it was also oddly familiar. Navigating new emotions with these little ones I’ve brought into the world is a growing experience, and it’s uncomfortable, yet I’ve longed for moments like this where I can respond positively.
“Well, my tummy got bigger after I carried you both,” I explained. The reality is, my whole body seems to have expanded over the last ten years, along with my appetite. I still lack full sensation in my lower abdomen, a result of two C-sections. After giving birth to Mia, I spent nearly an hour trembling uncontrollably while a meticulous surgeon cleared out scar tissue from my previous surgery. The shape of my midsection has changed from curvy to more rectangular. This area of my body feels somewhat numb, and I often cope by trying not to think about it. However, my children encourage me to see it differently.
I glanced down at my stomach. Yes, it is indeed soft. I have done well, I remind myself. For my kids, fat is merely a descriptor; it is me who attaches judgment to it. Suddenly, before I can overthink the moment, they are all over me, showering my tummy with kisses, resting their faces against it, and giggling.
“My special Mama, my soft Mama,” Mia sings. Jake blows raspberries that catch me off guard, sending me into fits of laughter. In that instant, I feel joy in my body — this tender, scarred, miraculous vessel that gives life.
This experience reminds me of the importance of self-acceptance and the beauty of our bodies, regardless of how they change. If you’re interested in more about the journey of motherhood and related topics, check out this insightful post here. If you’re looking for guidance on home insemination, Make a Mom offers an excellent resource.
If you want to understand more about IUI success rates, visit this WebMD article.
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Summary
This reflection shares a touching moment between a mother and her children when they humorously comment on her changing body. It emphasizes the importance of self-acceptance and the perspective children have towards body image, reminding us that love and laughter can transform how we view ourselves.
Keyphrase: body image acceptance
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