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I identify as an empath, and I take pride in this trait. Over the past year and a half, emotions have run high, leading me to spend quite a bit on tissues (and toilet paper, too). However, it turns out there’s more to my tendency to tear up while scrolling through social media than I initially thought. While I embrace my emotional side, science sheds light on why some individuals cry more often than others.
As highlighted in an article on Medium, “Crying is a fundamental aspect of our humanity. It allows us to show vulnerability while signaling our presence to the world. We cry not just to be heard, but also to convey that we are listening.” Essentially, crying is an empathetic reaction. As we mature from infancy, the act of crying evolves from mere communication to a means of connecting with others.
In my journey towards adulthood, I’ve observed a transformation in what triggers my tears. After experiencing trauma, I struggled to cry, perceiving it as a sign of weakness. I was determined not to give my abuser any advantage over my emotions. However, as I’ve healed, I’ve discovered that crying can stem from many emotions—not just sadness. I find myself tearing up from happiness, anger, anxiety, being overwhelmed, and even immense gratitude. Crying has become a response to deep feelings, transcending the notion that it’s solely linked to sadness.
If you notice that your child—or even you—cries more often at home, there’s a reason for it. Dr. Lauren Bylsma, an assistant professor of psychology and psychiatry at the University of Pittsburgh, explains that people are more likely to shed tears in settings where it’s socially acceptable and where they anticipate positive reactions from others. This underscores the importance of creating a safe emotional space for our children. My four-year-old’s meltdowns over a lost Hot Wheels car may be frustrating, but home is precisely where he should feel free to express those emotions.
Cultural influences, reactions to crying, and gender expectations can all impact how frequently individuals cry, as noted in a study published in Frontiers. The findings indicate that boys often experience shame when showing sadness and are frequently encouraged to express more aggressive emotions, such as anger. We’ve all encountered the outdated notion that “boys don’t cry,” right?! Thankfully, we are gradually evolving in how we support our children through their emotional experiences. One can hope that we will foster a generation that understands crying as a natural human response. Personally, I believe my emotional growth has improved because of my tears.
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In summary, crying is a complex emotional response that serves as a vital part of our human experience. By recognizing the factors influencing our tears, we can create supportive environments for ourselves and for our children, fostering healthy emotional expression.
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