I Waited Until 27 to Lose My Virginity to My Husband, And I Have No Regrets

I’ve only been intimate with my husband. Surprised? It’s not something you often hear from someone in their 40s. My choice to remain a virgin until marriage wasn’t driven by religious beliefs, even though I am a devoted Catholic. I’m not claiming to be morally superior for waiting.

In my younger years, my faith influenced my decisions, but that was mostly during high school, long before I ventured into serious dating. At 27, I lost my virginity, a rarity among my friends. I often found myself labeled as “the virgin friend.” While I never understood why people felt the need to discuss my private life, it didn’t bother me much. If someone wasn’t interested in me because I wouldn’t sleep with them on the first date, then they weren’t the kind of person I wanted in my life. Over time, I realized that my virginity had become a significant part of my identity, and I wasn’t ready to share that with just anyone.

Before meeting my husband, I had one serious relationship during college. We were close and shared a lot, but we never went all the way. He respected my boundaries, which shaped my expectations for future relationships. I wanted to be with someone who valued my choices and treated me with respect.

I met my husband at work, and after a few drinks together, I felt a connection. During one of our dinners, I revealed my truth about being a virgin and my intentions for our relationship. His positive reaction surprised me and made me feel at ease. I sensed that he was different.

As our relationship evolved, I realized he was the person I had been waiting for. He respected me and our relationship deepened in a way I hadn’t experienced before. I felt confident in my decision to share this part of myself with him, and when the moment arrived, it felt right. We had discussed it thoroughly, and I had one request: I wanted to be sober for this significant moment. So, it happened on an ordinary Sunday morning—not a grand occasion like our wedding night. I didn’t feel disappointment or guilt; I felt joy and contentment.

Some may find it unusual that I’ve only been with one person, questioning how I know if my sex life is fulfilling. The truth is, I don’t have a comparison, but I’m satisfied with what I have. I often wonder how it feels to be married and know that the best experiences were with someone else, and I think that would trouble me. However, everyone has different perspectives.

While my husband wasn’t a virgin when we met, I’ve never inquired about his past. I trust him and that’s what matters. I did insist on safety, so he was tested before we became intimate—my health and safety are paramount to me.

Fast forward 15 years, and I’d choose the same path again. I have no regrets about waiting or my decision to share my first time with him. Is this the right choice for everyone? Definitely not! But I know I’m not alone in making such a decision.

I have a daughter now, and I’d encourage her to consider her choices thoughtfully. I wouldn’t pressure her to follow in my footsteps, but I hope she finds a partner who treats her with respect—this was crucial for me.

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Summary

The author shares her experience of waiting until 27 to lose her virginity to her husband, emphasizing the importance of respect and personal choice in relationships. She reflects on her earlier relationship and how it shaped her expectations, ultimately leading her to a fulfilling marriage without regrets about her decision.

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