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In just five months, I will be celebrating the milestone of turning 40. Instead of dwelling on regrets or stressing about my fitness—which seems to be the norm—I find myself filled with anticipation. This upcoming birthday feels more like a celebration than something to fear. To me, age represents a significant occasion that deserves recognition.
My excitement stems from a journey filled with medical challenges over the last fifteen years. I faced a near-fatal situation that thankfully ended in a diagnosis rather than tragedy. After living with type 1 diabetes for twelve years, I discovered a lump in my breast. While initial scans seemed hopeful, a biopsy later confirmed early-stage breast cancer. Following a mastectomy and extensive therapy, I was beginning to regain my confidence when I experienced a recurrence of breast cancer.
I recently completed twelve rounds of chemotherapy and immunotherapy and am now undergoing radiation therapy. This past year has certainly been a rollercoaster, but I am profoundly grateful to be alive and healing. My experiences have shown me that reaching 40 is a privilege when I consider that I might not have made it this far at all.
Embracing Confidence and Authenticity
With age comes a newfound confidence. I am becoming a person who knows what I want and is willing to pursue it. I make decisions based on my instincts, and I dress according to my own style preferences—regardless of current trends. Grey is my favorite color, and I proudly own a wardrobe filled with various shades of charcoal. The latest fashion fads don’t matter to me.
I don’t obsess over the scale; my feelings about myself take precedence over any number. Similarly, I don’t scrutinize my reflection for every imperfection. Instead, I choose to appreciate my stretch marks and scars as part of my journey rather than viewing them with disdain. It’s up to me to define how I feel about my body, so I choose to fill that narrative with love.
Living Life on My Own Terms
As I approach 40, I’ve realized that I no longer seek approval from others or feel the need to get permission to live my life. I have one chance at this life, and it’s my responsibility to shape it as I desire. If someone disapproves of my choices, that’s their issue, not mine. Everyone has enough going on in their lives that the decisions of others, as long as they aren’t harmful, shouldn’t concern them. It feels empowering to dismiss negativity and criticism.
I also remain steadfast in my values and passions. I’m dedicated to advocating for women’s health and encouraging them to speak up in medical scenarios. I regularly remind others about the importance of self-breast exams and scheduling mammograms. If I worried about what people thought, I wouldn’t be so open about breast health. Luckily, I don’t seek validation from anyone, especially not those who clutch their pearls at the mention of these topics. My philosophy is simple: if someone doesn’t like what they see in me, they can look away.
Standing Up for What Matters
I’ve become adept at recognizing insincerity and refuse to tolerate pettiness. I’m committed to calling out racism, sexism, ableism, and other forms of discrimination. My children are always watching and learning, and I want them to see a parent who stands up for what is right without hesitation. I hope to instill in them the importance of kindness without being a doormat and the courage to challenge the norm.
Over the years, I’ve also become a more dependable friend. I’ve learned that if a friendship doesn’t serve me, it’s okay to let it go without drama. Not every person I once called a friend needs to remain in my life forever. I know what I want and need in friendships and recognize when a relationship is draining. If it is, I’m not interested.
Finding Joy in Relationships
Speaking of relationships, my husband and I have become that classic “old married couple,” and I love it. I thrive on the stability and comfort our marriage provides. We communicate openly and embrace each other’s quirks, which brings a sense of peace.
Lately, I’ve been diving into more nonfiction, eager to learn about myself. Have you ever explored your enneagram? It’s intriguing! I’ve come to understand that my straightforwardness and decisiveness have advantages. I’m also working on areas where I want to evolve, like being more vulnerable and addressing my anxiety, inspired by thinkers like Brené Brown.
Looking Forward to the Future
Embracing my true self has made me realize that turning 40 is a thrilling prospect rather than something to dread. If I’ve come this far in the past decade, what exciting adventures lie ahead in the next ten? Only time will reveal that.
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Summary
As I look forward to turning 40, I embrace the journey that has brought me here, filled with challenges that have strengthened my resolve and confidence. I prioritize self-love, authenticity, and the importance of standing up for what matters to me. I am committed to living my life on my own terms, free from the need for approval from others.
Keyphrase: Turning 40 with Confidence
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