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As our children head back to school after an extended break, this should be a moment filled with joy and relief. We envision heartwarming pictures, big hugs, and a few happy tears. It’s a chance for parents to finally return to some semblance of normalcy, right? Wrong.
Your friend with kids is likely not doing okay—especially if their children are under 12.
Last year was incredibly challenging. We juggled working from home while keeping our children entertained and educated. Our meetings were often accompanied by the sounds of kids arguing over tablet time or playing drums in the background. We struggled with guilt about screen time while frantically creating educational schedules that often led to tears and endless reruns of cartoons. Amid all this, we worried about our own well-being and that of our parents.
We avoided farmer’s markets due to health risks, feeling guilty for not providing healthier meals. Fear kept us away from playgrounds, so we resorted to YouTube exercise videos, only to feel bad about the screen time again. Meanwhile, our own health deteriorated as we found little time for self-care.
So, this year should be a relief, right? The kids are back in school, and parents can reconnect with friends and get back to healthier eating. But the first day of school came, and it was anything but a breath of fresh air.
With the Delta variant surging and pediatric cases rising, we spent sleepless nights convincing ourselves that sending our kids to school was the right choice. We calculated the benefits against the risks, realizing we needed to send them to school to maintain our jobs—because without work, how could we afford the organic food we promised ourselves?
Yet, this decision brought no sense of relief.
We find ourselves obsessively scrolling through news articles about child infections and statistics that we know are low but still haunt us. When we take our kids to school, we cling to them, snap a quick masked picture, and then begin to worry if our child could become another statistic.
Our stomachs twist in knots, but we still struggle to eat well. We often end up finishing the lunch leftovers our kids didn’t touch. We get sick frequently, always fearing it’s COVID. We test ourselves and avoid hugging our children until we receive results, worrying, “What if I’m the one who makes them sick?”
Despite our fears, we put on brave faces for our kids. We sing, play, and read to them until they drift off to sleep. Then, as we collapse into our own exhaustion, we wonder how much longer we can keep this up. And we find ourselves endlessly clicking on more articles, repeating the cycle of worry.
So if you’ve noticed that your mom friend seems a bit dimmer lately—less spark in her smile than before—understand that she’s likely not okay. I know I’m not.
If you want to explore more about this topic, check out one of our other posts. For those looking into home insemination options, Make A Mom provides valuable information, while NICHD offers excellent resources on pregnancy.
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In summary, as we navigate this complex time, it’s crucial to check in on our friends who are parents. They may be putting on a brave face, but behind it, they could be struggling more than we realize.
Keyphrase: Friend with kids struggles
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