Examining the Evolution of Manners Through Lillian Thompson’s 1948 Etiquette Guide

When we reminisce about the 1940s, our thoughts often drift to World War II, despite it being a distant memory for many. With the war’s conclusion in 1945, Americans turned their attention to everyday life, embracing trends like finger waves and the Victory Roll. Meanwhile, Tupperware emerged as the latest household innovation, and George de Mestral was busy refining his groundbreaking invention, Velcro, in 1948.

That same year saw the re-release of Lillian Thompson’s influential etiquette guide, “The Standard Book of Etiquette,” originally published in 1921. This classic work set high standards for social conduct, but much has changed since then. While the principles of politeness may be timeless, our understanding of what constitutes good manners has evolved significantly (especially considering that “The Standard Book of Etiquette” reflects the biases of its time, including ableism).

Let’s delve into some of Thompson’s advice and see how it resonates today:

“Is it inappropriate for a woman to knit during a lecture? Answer: It is discourteous to the lecturer.” (p. 433)

Thompson emphasizes that knitting in public can be distracting. However, in a modern context, we see individuals like Olympic diver Jake Reynolds knitting during events. Sometimes, activities like knitting can actually enhance focus for neurodiverse individuals, a nuance Thompson didn’t seem to grasp.

“In a well-managed household, the telephone should always be answered by a responsible person…” (p. 365)

While Thompson advocates for having a capable person answer the phone, the notion of employing a maid raises questions about inclusivity. In today’s world, everyone should be encouraged to engage in their responsibilities, regardless of societal expectations.

“When introduced to someone, if there’s an awkward pause, make a simple remark to encourage conversation…” (p. 20)

Thompson’s advice to ease into conversation feels particularly relevant today. Instead of defaulting to mundane topics, we can explore more intriguing subjects that resonate with our experiences and interests.

“The most important factor in choosing Christmas cards is suitability…” (p. 333)

Thompson’s focus on appropriateness in card selection remains pertinent. Instead of sending frivolous cards to those experiencing hardships, we can choose more thoughtful designs that reflect their circumstances.

“Considerate behavior is essential for a well-liked guest…” (p. 36-37)

The expectation to visit those who may feel isolated, such as the elderly or shut-ins, is timeless. While we should be mindful of their needs, it’s also essential to balance our schedules.

“Do men still carry a cane when dressed formally? Answer: Only if they wish.” (p. 360)

Today, men (and anyone) can accessorize however they choose, embracing personal style without rigid rules. The cane can be a statement piece, just like any other distinctive accessory.

Overall, Thompson’s “The Standard Book of Etiquette” serves as a reminder that while the essence of good manners is vital, our interpretations and applications of these principles must adapt to contemporary values. While she may not have envisioned our modern society, her work still encourages us to uphold civility and respect, even if we approach these ideals with a more inclusive mindset today.

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In summary, while Lillian Thompson’s etiquette guide offers insight into the social norms of her time, our understanding of manners has developed to be more inclusive and adaptable to the needs of the present.

Keyphrase: Evolution of Manners in Etiquette

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