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In many respects, I count myself among the fortunate during this pandemic. Thankfully, our family has managed to avoid COVID-19, and while I know people who have faced severe illness, none of my close friends or family have succumbed to it. My partner and I both retained our jobs, and our children’s mental well-being stayed largely intact despite the long lockdowns.
Navigating this pandemic as a working parent has been a challenge, but my partner has been incredibly supportive. He stepped up to help our kids with the chaos of online schooling while we both worked from home when COVID first struck. He even took a leave of absence for the 2020-2021 school year to assist with our children’s online education, which eventually turned into full-time homeschooling for our youngest.
While at home, my partner took on additional household responsibilities without complaint or needing too much guidance. Truly, he’s been a gem. However, he hasn’t shared the emotional or mental burden of this pandemic in the same way I have, nor has he taken an active role in family decision-making regarding pandemic-related issues. I don’t blame him for it; worrying about things beyond one’s control—like a global pandemic—just isn’t in his nature. I’ve naturally taken charge when it comes to making critical safety decisions for our kids, especially knowing he trusts my judgment.
To illustrate, I have essentially dictated our family’s social interactions during this pandemic. When the world began to reopen in the summer of 2020, I decided that outdoor, masked visits with relatives were the safest option since no one was vaccinated, and the risk of unknowingly transmitting the virus was too high. My partner agreed with my decision and supported it. He assured me that had he felt otherwise, he would have voiced his concerns.
When deliberating about the previous school year, my partner also shared my apprehensions about sending the kids back to school amidst a pandemic without knowing if safety protocols would be effective. However, he didn’t lose sleep over the decision or dive deep into research about COVID in children, mask effectiveness, or ventilation standards. He ultimately didn’t make the final call, not merely because he knew I would, but because he didn’t feel strongly enough to take a definitive stance.
Now, as we navigate the Delta variant, I find myself in the same position once again. It was such a relief when three out of four of us got vaccinated this past spring. For a brief moment, I felt the emotional weight of the pandemic lift. But now, with the emergence of Delta, we’re back to questioning what to do next. The resurgence of cases has caught everyone off guard, and the fact that vaccinated individuals can also spread the virus has added a new layer of complexity for parents like me, especially with unvaccinated children at home.
My mind is racing with worries about how to keep our unvaccinated child safe when we visit vaccinated family members. I’m trying to determine what type of mask is best for school and whether sending my child to school is even a safe option. Late-night anxieties have crept back into my life, and I’ve found myself in tears more than once.
I’m just so tired—tired of the pandemic and tired of figuring out how to navigate this challenging landscape. While my partner acknowledges the situation is difficult, he isn’t as emotionally affected, partly because he knows I will handle the mental and emotional load. He trusts me to make decisions for our family, and while it’s a blessing, it often feels overwhelming.
I sometimes wonder if there’s a way for him to share the mental load more evenly, but I’m not quite sure what that would look like. Should he pretend to have stronger opinions? Recognize decisions before I stress over them? I honestly don’t know what I want or what I expect to change. I just feel the weight of it all, and I know I’m not alone. The pandemic is tough for everyone, but being the family’s decision-maker adds a unique kind of strain.
If you’re interested in more insights about navigating family decisions during these times, check out some related resources like this article on mental health or learn more about home insemination kits. For excellent information on pregnancy and home insemination, visit WebMD.
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In summary, the pandemic has posed significant challenges for families, especially for those shouldering the burden of decision-making. While support is present, the emotional weight can be heavy, leading to exhaustion.
Keyphrase: Family Pandemic Decision Maker
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