I'm a Mom with ADHD — Here’s How It Impacts My Everyday Life

The common image of ADHD often features a young boy bursting with energy, bouncing off the walls, unable to sit still or concentrate, and always fidgeting. But that’s not the full story.

Hello, I’m a mom who lives with ADHD, and I don’t fit that stereotype at all. In fact, I often feel completely drained by everything around me. My mind races from one thought to another, making it hard to focus on any single task. This results in sensory overload as I try to manage the chaos— the mess, the noise, the constant touching, and the whining or crying from my kids.

Struggling with concentration has been a part of my life for as long as I can remember. I recall zoning out for hours while attempting to do homework, repeatedly reading the same lines without actually grasping the content. This led to feelings of inadequacy, especially when I compared myself to my peers who seemed to excel effortlessly.

Recognizing my ADHD early in life was somewhat comforting, but I truly understood its impact on my daily routine only after becoming a mother.

Daily Life

I tend to procrastinate everything, which turns my evenings into a frantic race just to check off a few items from my to-do list. Even on days when I feel a burst of motivation, I can usually only manage to accomplish one or two simple tasks.

This challenge also affects my ability to engage with my children. My brain craves constant stimulation, and the thought of playing with the same set of toy food repeatedly can feel exhausting. When I do hyper-focus on a task, breaking away from that can be nearly impossible.

There have been countless occasions when my kids have had to entertain themselves while I find myself lost in a rabbit hole of research—like looking up how to use rabbit droppings as fertilizer, which spirals into how to care for rabbits, and what they eat (and no, I don’t even own rabbits or have a garden!).

We often have the TV on in the background. I feel the need for some kind of noise, but that often results in my kids watching a show while I sit nearby scrolling through social media or chatting with friends on Marco Polo.

Frustrations

Caffeine has little effect on me. It tastes delicious, but it doesn’t boost my energy, which is less than ideal for a busy mom.

I frequently misplace my phone at home. It has become such a routine that I find myself compulsively checking for it when I’m out and about.

Additionally, I struggle with conversation dynamics; I often think it’s my turn to speak, only to have someone else chime in first. And when the opportunity finally comes, I completely forget what I wanted to say—every single time.

But the most frustrating aspect of my experience is the overstimulation. I’ve always thought that having ADHD would make me great at multitasking, but it’s quite the opposite. Trying to juggle multiple tasks at once overwhelms me. It feels as if I need to put on a performance for my kids just to get anything done around the house. Cooking dinner while answering my toddler’s questions can become too much, and I’ve even forgotten about dinner altogether while helping my little one with something else.

Mental Health

For a long time, I questioned what was wrong with me. Comparing myself to others and their achievements has contributed to my frustrations. Logically, I understand that ADHD affects my focus and ability to live in the moment. Yet, I often catch myself thinking, “If I just tried harder, I could be ‘normal.’”

Why can’t I just sit down and write a blog post? Why can’t I fully enjoy my time with family? Why is multitasking such a struggle? Why can’t I simply pursue hobbies like a typical person, instead of hyper-focusing on them and then losing all interest when that focus fades?

I work hard to remind myself that I’m a good mom, wife, and friend, but those negative thoughts do creep in from time to time.

The most vital aspect of maintaining my mental health is spending time with my close friends. They are among the few people with whom I feel entirely at ease, and they help me embrace my quirks.

Fears

Like every parent, I worry about whether I’m raising my children correctly or if my best efforts are enough. While I’m not overly concerned about my children inheriting ADHD (which is likely), I do fear that my own struggles might impact my parenting, leading them to face the same challenges I did.

I dread the thought that my children might feel like failures and that it would somehow be my fault. Finding a balance between being a fully functional mom and allowing my kids to see my struggles is a constant challenge. I believe it’s important for them to witness me overcoming obstacles, but I grapple with the fact that I’m struggling daily.

I’m sure my toddlers don’t notice it now, but as they grow older, I don’t want them to think their difficulties are a result of my shortcomings.

Notes for Moms with ADHD

You’re doing an amazing job and deserve all the grace in the world. You don’t have to do it all to be a supermom; your strength lies in managing the challenges that come with ADHD—something many moms don’t have to navigate.

It’s perfectly okay to seek help, whether from a babysitter or a therapist; asking for support is a sign of strength, not weakness. Lastly, remember to be kind to yourself. You truly deserve it.

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In summary, being a mom with ADHD presents unique challenges that affect daily life, parenting, and mental health. While navigating these hurdles can be tough, practicing self-compassion and seeking support is essential.

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I’m a Mom with ADHD — Here’s How It Impacts My Everyday Life