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Content warning: This article discusses high-risk pregnancies, miscarriages, and mental health issues, which some readers may find distressing.
After experiencing two miscarriages, Lisa was taken aback when she learned she was pregnant again. Along with her history of miscarriages, she also dealt with chronic hypertension and was classified as overweight, leading her doctors to label her pregnancy as high-risk. Throughout her care, Lisa was passed around to various OB-GYNs, each urging her to lose weight during her pregnancy.
“They treated me like I was just a statistic instead of a person,” Lisa shared. “While I understand the need for thoroughness, their approach made me feel more anxious and depressed rather than supported, even though I did everything to maintain a healthy pregnancy.” Despite discussions about her mental health, Lisa felt her concerns were brushed off. “I was terrified at every little sensation; I constantly worried about miscarrying again or about preterm labor. Even now, 2.5 years after giving birth, I frequently think about SIDS.”
Similarly, Sarah faced challenges when she discovered she was pregnant with twins, one of which was diagnosed with Intrauterine Growth Restriction. “As a first-time mom, I received little guidance on the resources available to me,” she recalled. “My doctors knew I had a history of depression, but it felt like they just noted it on my chart without offering support. I felt isolated and overwhelmed.”
This highlights a troubling paradox for women with high-risk pregnancies: they are often informed of the potential dangers, which heightens anxiety and emotional distress, yet they frequently lack adequate mental health support during this trying time. To shed light on this issue, we consulted with healthcare professionals and women who have navigated high-risk pregnancies to explore the emotional support options available and how friends and family can assist.
Understanding High-Risk Pregnancies
A range of factors can classify a pregnancy as high-risk. According to the Mayo Clinic, these include advanced maternal age (35 and older), substance use during pregnancy, carrying multiples, existing maternal health conditions (like high blood pressure or diabetes), previous pregnancy complications, and current pregnancy issues (such as fetal growth restrictions or placenta abnormalities). With an increasing number of pregnancies occurring in women over 35, high-risk pregnancies are becoming more commonplace and should not be viewed as rare.
Types of High-Risk Pregnancies
Examples of high-risk conditions include:
- Premature labor: Occurs when contractions happen before the 37th week of pregnancy.
- Placenta previa: A condition where the placenta covers the cervix, leading to heavy bleeding.
- Preeclampsia: Characterized by high blood pressure and protein in the urine, which can affect liver and kidney functions.
Don’t Rely Solely on Your OB-GYN for Mental Health Support
While it would be ideal for all healthcare providers to monitor their patients’ mental health, this is not always the reality. “Generally, OB-GYNs don’t prioritize mental health inquiries, despite the well-documented anxiety and stress associated with high-risk pregnancies,” explains Dr. Emily Wijkstrom, a psychotherapist in Pittsburgh. “There’s a notable disconnect in the medical community regarding the relationship between mental and physical health.”
However, some practitioners do provide excellent mental health support. Heidi McBain, a licensed marriage and family therapist, notes that clients who received adequate time during their appointments often felt seen and understood.
Finding Emotional Support During a High-Risk Pregnancy
Women facing high-risk pregnancies are at an increased risk for anxiety and depression, according to Dr. Emily Guarnotta, a clinical psychologist. “Anxiety is a natural response to perceived threats,” she explains. “In high-risk pregnancies, the threats often revolve around the health of the mother and baby.”
If you are experiencing a high-risk pregnancy, it’s crucial to build a solid support network. Don’t hesitate to ask for help. “Consider starting therapy to navigate the complex emotions linked to a high-risk pregnancy,” suggests Kristy Holloway, a mental health clinician. “Joining a support group, even virtually, can provide valuable connections.”
Karin Mahoney, from Postpartum Support Virginia, emphasizes the benefits of online communities, including Facebook groups with diverse women sharing similar experiences. She also encourages utilizing counseling services available online.
It’s essential to recognize that support is vital not just for first-time mothers, as Dr. LaTasha Perkins, a family physician, notes that even those with medical backgrounds can face anxiety during high-risk pregnancies. “Women shouldn’t navigate this journey alone; they must express when they need assistance,” she advises. “Prioritizing mental health is just as crucial as physical health, as mental stress can exacerbate high-risk conditions.”
Don’t hesitate to communicate with your doctor, partner, or friends about your feelings. They may have helpful suggestions or simply be there to lend support. Dr. Perkins suggests creating a “Mom Tribe” — a network of mothers or soon-to-be mothers who can provide education and encouragement. “Connecting with others who have faced high-risk pregnancies can alleviate feelings of isolation,” she adds.
How Friends, Family, and Partners Can Help
If someone you care about is going through a high-risk pregnancy, it’s natural to feel uncertain about how to support them. “It takes a village. Partners and loved ones should frequently check in with simple questions like ‘How are you feeling?’ or ‘What can I do to help?’” says Dr. Wijkstrom. These inquiries can help the expectant mother feel understood and connected.
Listening without judgment is also crucial. Emily Souder, a therapist specializing in perinatal mental health, advises against offering unsolicited advice unless explicitly requested. Instead, consider practical support, such as bringing meals, grocery shopping, or helping with older children.
When in doubt, remind your loved one that you are there for them. Mahoney recommends validating their feelings: “Acknowledge that you may not know what to say but recognize that this is a tough time for them.” Sometimes, just being present is the most helpful thing you can do.
Some names have been changed.
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In summary, emotional support is crucial for women experiencing high-risk pregnancies, as they often face heightened anxiety and stress. Building a support system, seeking therapy, and maintaining open communication can help navigate this challenging journey. Friends and family play a vital role, providing reassurance, practical help, and a listening ear.
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