Two months ago, I opened up to my social media audience about a challenging personal journey. Alongside my decision to have my breast implants removed due to ongoing pain and various symptoms, I discovered a lump that led to a second diagnosis of breast cancer in four years. After a series of doctor visits and scans, I learned that my cancer had recurred, and I felt compelled to share this reality.
I believe in transforming personal hardships into opportunities for advocacy and education, aiming to help others navigate their struggles. When I shared my cancer diagnosis online, I saw a surge of support and gained thousands of followers eager to connect over shared experiences. However, this positive momentum came to a halt when I shifted my focus to the vital topic of anti-racism.
Most of my posts revolved around my health updates and upcoming surgeries. I continued to advocate for self-breast exams, and along the way, I welcomed many new followers, many of whom shared their own cancer stories and offered generous support. But when I began discussing anti-racism, I noticed a significant drop in my follower count—dozens, then hundreds unfollowed me. It became clear that while many were quick to shower me with support during my cancer journey, discussions on racism made some followers uncomfortable enough to leave.
Some followers have messaged me about what I ought to discuss, insisting that I shouldn’t address issues like race. They’ve questioned if I’m “racist against white people,” which I remind them isn’t a valid concept. Anti-racism is not a political stance; it’s a moral imperative that touches every aspect of life. It’s crucial for everyone to stand against racism.
It seems my narrative of battling cancer is deemed more palatable and inspirational than discussing the struggles my children and others face due to systemic racism. When I voiced my observations about the unfollows, some responded with “good riddance.” Initially, I thought it was best to let those who “hated” me go, but it soon troubled me more deeply. If these individuals are unfollowing a white woman speaking out on race, I fear they likely aren’t engaging with BIPOC voices either.
Their actions highlight a troubling reality: they are perpetuating a system that upholds white supremacy through their silence and fragility. Their discomfort with the topic of race is a reflection of a larger societal issue that manifests in various areas, from workplaces to community spaces. Racism can spread quickly through microaggressions and outdated beliefs.
These individuals, who should be confronting their own biases, choose to disengage rather than engage in the hard work of unlearning racial inequity. They prefer to witness my health struggles over taking the necessary steps to advocate for equity for all.
I refuse to stop discussing anti-racism, even at the cost of losing followers. Social media isn’t about popularity for me; it’s about sharing vital information for the benefit of others. I wish the issues of equity and justice for my children mattered as much to people as my cancer journey did.
Ignoring the realities faced by people of color, including my own children, only serves to perpetuate systemic oppression. Ignorance is not bliss; it harms communities and threatens lives. Every white person has a responsibility to dismantle harmful systems. Prioritizing comfort over challenging discussions will not lead to a more equitable society.
To those who unfollowed me, I noticed, but I don’t desperately need your presence. What concerns me is understanding why you left. I hope one day you recognize the value of every life, including those different from your own.
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