I see friends organizing Zoom happy hours, exchanging gift cards over email, and hosting adorable drive-by baby showers. Meanwhile, I struggle to respond to texts in a timely manner. Honestly, I’m the worst kind of pandemic friend. I’ve retreated into my cozy home and lost touch with the outside world. The frustrating part? I know I should care, but I just don’t. Sorry, everyone.
Please don’t take it personally. It’s not you, it’s me. We’re not ending our friendship; we’re simply taking a break while I focus on myself. Right now, that self-care involves lounging in bed, watching “Firefly Lane,” while my kids argue over PS5 controllers. I have zero motivation to put on makeup just to navigate a virtual call where we struggle to unmute and deal with a toddler having a meltdown. We all have our challenges. Let’s deal with them off-camera. I remember what you look like, so just text me.
If you’re getting married, having a baby, or celebrating a kid’s birthday, I’m more than willing to send a gift. But I really don’t want to join the parade of people dropping off presents while you wave awkwardly in the cold. My daughter’s birthday is coming up, and we’ll have a drive-by celebration, but only with family. I’m not about to pressure anyone else into it. This is becoming overwhelming.
There’s so much expectation to overdo things during the pandemic that I worry when life returns to normal, it’ll be even worse. We’ll have to deal with gigantic yard signs and long birthday parades. Kids might not even know how to enjoy a simple cake and ice cream anymore.
You might think I’m being selfish. Maybe I should be more attentive to my friends, more connected. Perhaps I’m being unfair. But right now, my focus is on my family and myself, and that’s just how it is.
Honestly, the reason we’re not meeting in person is that I’m not comfortable yet. My bubble is small, and I’m not eager to expand it. This isn’t about spreading fear; it’s about being safe. My family is my priority, not a casual playdate.
I want my kids to understand the immense grief and loss our world is experiencing. Yes, their routines have changed, but compared to many, they’re incredibly lucky. Our family has largely avoided the virus because we’re playing it safe, which means staying home most of the time. They’re not going to friends’ houses or parties, and aside from a few masked outdoor activities, they’re enjoying online games like Minecraft. And that’s perfectly fine.
So what am I doing? I’m cherishing my time with my kids more than ever. We’re bonding, sharing meals, and enjoying each other’s company. My husband is home, and we’re playing games and laughing together. It’s a simple life, and it’s wonderful. It’s unfortunate that it took such a challenging time to realize this, but I don’t regret it. Right now, if you don’t live with me, you’re just not at the top of my priority list. Love me or hate me, that’s the reality.
I truly care about my friends and want to see their kids and celebrate their milestones. I want to be as loving and supportive as I’ve always been, but for now, that’s happening through social media and texts. Don’t expect much more from me for the time being.
As life gradually returns to normal, as more people get vaccinated and case numbers drop, I’ll be ready to socialize in person again. I look forward to hugging and laughing over dinner. Until then, remember that I love you and I’m just a text away, even if it takes me a bit to respond because I’m busy playing with my kids. If you’re interested in more thoughts on this topic, check out this blog post.
Keyphrase: Pandemic friendships and self-care
Tags: home insemination kit, home insemination syringe, self insemination