How to Get Ready for Divorce When You’re Not Sure Where to Begin

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Navigating the emotional and mental landscape of divorce can be incredibly taxing. Yet, remaining in an unfulfilling marriage can be just as daunting. If you’ve made the pivotal decision to pursue a divorce, you’re only at the beginning of what may become a lengthy journey. If you’re uncertain about how to prepare, rest assured you’re not alone; this topic garners nearly 1,900 searches each month. Before seeking legal advice or discussing your situation with others, take a moment to envision what your ideal post-divorce life looks like. How do you wish to divide shared assets? What are your thoughts on custody arrangements if children are involved? What about any pets? Clarifying these details will make it simpler to communicate your needs to your attorney and your spouse.

Once you’ve decided to file for divorce but feel overwhelmed by the next steps, it’s essential to equip yourself with a divorce checklist and gather all relevant documents to kick off the process. Here are some strategies to help you prepare for divorce and ease the journey ahead.

Start Saving Money

Transitioning from a shared financial life to standing on your own can be quite challenging. Hence, it’s vital to start saving money as soon as you decide on divorce. Consider opening a personal bank account if you haven’t already. As Bryan Thompson of LegalEase explains, “Any income earned during marriage is deemed marital property and will be divided equitably between you and your spouse.” By having a separate account where your paycheck is deposited, you can prevent your spouse from using those funds before asset division occurs.

Get Organized and Document Everything

Begin compiling your paperwork—everything from financial statements to property deeds and a monthly budget for child-related expenses. Utilize a divorce checklist to guide you through the steps. Start documenting crucial details, as you’ll need them for your attorney. “Keep track of both your income and expenses and those of your spouse,” advises Thompson. Hold onto your bank statements, credit card records, tax returns, and any bills. If you have children, document their activities and note which parent is responsible for transporting them to events like soccer practice.

Here are some essential documents to gather before filing:

  • Income tax returns
  • Employment records
  • Financial statements (bank statements)
  • Investment account details
  • Pension information
  • Retirement accounts
  • Children’s savings accounts
  • Debt information
  • Wills and trust agreements
  • Social Security statements
  • Credit reports
  • Monthly budget worksheet

Take Responsibility

Divorce can be overwhelming, but it’s crucial to be an active participant in the process, even if you’re not the one initiating it. “Engaging actively in your divorce will often lead to a better settlement and can make the process quicker, less stressful, and more affordable,” says Laura Fields, a divorce consultant.

Seek Support

Divorce can feel isolating, so it’s essential to create a robust support network. Whether it’s friends, family, or a community group, having people to lean on is invaluable. “Utilizing available support systems can help you navigate the complex emotions that arise during a divorce,” Fields notes. “By managing your emotions, you can prepare more effectively for negotiations.”

Find a Divorce Mediator or Attorney

Not every divorce necessitates a combative court process. In some situations, couples can resolve their issues through mediation. However, both parties must be fully agreeable for this to work. Most often, you’ll need to find a divorce attorney to advocate for you in court. This process may involve consulting with several lawyers until you find the right fit for your unique circumstances.

Does Infidelity Affect Property Division?

Typically, judges do not consider infidelity when it comes to dividing assets. However, it’s still wise to document any instances of cheating your spouse may have committed. Depending on the state and specifics of the case, infidelity generally does not impact child custody arrangements unless a child’s safety is at risk.

Summary

Preparing for a divorce can feel overwhelming, but by taking proactive steps—such as saving money, organizing your documents, and seeking support—you can navigate this challenging time more smoothly. Remember to take an active role in the process and, if needed, consult a divorce attorney or mediator to help guide you through the proceedings. For additional insights on related topics, check out this article on steroid use and the importance of emotional support during significant life changes.

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