We really wish Aunt Flo would just pack up and leave for good, because let’s face it, periods are a nightmare. For those of us who menstruate, each month brings a familiar cycle of discomfort and annoyance. While a handful of individuals may find strength in their menstrual cycle, many of us are simply trying to survive the chaos it brings. And the contributors to The Confessional aren’t shy about sharing their frustrations.
Confessional #12345678
“Today is day 2 of my period, and let me tell you, it feels like I’m wading through hell. I’ve been dealing with this for 37 years; that’s nearly 450 days of misery! Can menopause hurry up already?!”
From cravings that could rival a bottomless pit to the infamous period poops, here’s a rundown of the most annoying things about “that time of the month,” as shared by anonymous voices from Home Insemination Kit.
Let’s talk about PMS. Even before our period officially starts, we can feel the emotional rollercoaster making its rounds.
Confessional #23456789
“I get so ragey before my period. I could spark a fight over nothing. Yep, Aunt Flo is on her way.”
Confessional #34567890
“Right before my period, I become easily irritated. It’s not pretty for those around me.”
Confessional #45678901
“A chocolate chip cookie covered in peanut butter is the only thing keeping me from going postal during PMS.”
Ah, food! Sometimes, the only remedy for our woes is a snack attack. Although the science behind our cravings is still up for debate, researchers believe that carbohydrates boost serotonin levels, which is why we often find ourselves raiding the pantry. After all, who can blame us for some emotional eating?
Confessional #56789012
“After two glasses of wine and a mountain of Cheetos dipped in sour cream, I realized my period is approaching. Gotta love those cravings! And yes, the Cheetos were baked.”
Confessional #67890123
“In just a couple of hours, I polished off half a can of Pringles, two handfuls of Doritos, a small bowl of dark chocolate M&Ms, and four cookies worth of cookie dough. Damn you, PMS cravings! Now I’m also dealing with cramps and an upset stomach.”
Confessional #78901234
“Yep, my period must be here. I’ve just eaten four breakfasts!”
And when we overindulge, it’s not just our waistlines that suffer. Oh no, the digestive aftermath is a whole different beast during this time.
What is it about shedding our uterine lining that makes bowel movements go haywire? Blame it on prostaglandins, which are hormone-like substances that stimulate contractions in the uterus but also affect the digestive system.
Confessional #89012345
“Period poops are just the worst. Bring on menopause!”
Confessional #90123456
“Let’s just say the gas and bloating during my period are truly next level. I feel like a balloon ready to pop! Someone please deflate me!”
Confessional #01234567
“I get constipated and my farts smell horrible every month before my period. As if the cramps weren’t enough to deal with!”
And if that wasn’t enough, sometimes the unthinkable happens:
Confessional #12345679
“My tampon tends to launch out when I poop. I only recently realized that this isn’t a universal experience.”
Yet, the surprise doesn’t just happen on the toilet.
Confessional #23456790
“I attempted to do sit-ups today during my heavy period day, and my tampon shot out. What the heck?”
Confessional #34567891
“I sneezed and my tampon came out. Seriously, what is happening?!”
Between the cramps, digestive drama, and that overall icky feeling, is it any wonder we just want to curl up in bed for a few days?
Confessional #45678902
“My cramps are so bad; I wish I could just be 12 again and stay in bed with a heating pad. Who needs parenting or being a spouse right now?”
Confessional #56789013
“I wish someone had warned me that periods can get worse after 40, especially if you’ve had kids. Everything about mine is dreadful, and they last longer now. Ugh.”
Not only do we endure this every month, but we also have to navigate the embarrassment that comes with it.
Confessional #67890124
“Dressed up and feeling great for the first time in ages, I went to the bathroom only to discover a leak! Thank goodness for my black dress and nylons; at least no one saw!”
Confessional #78901235
“While lying in bed wearing my comfy underwear, my husband mistakenly pulled my tampon string thinking it was a thread. Awkward!”
Confessional #89012346
“A huge, gross, jelly-like blob of period blood slid down my leg during a pedicure. I was mortified!”
Confessional #90123457
“White office chairs? No thanks. Can we get some black ones? Signed, a woman with a heavy period.”
But despite all the discomfort and chaos, we persist and get things done like the bosses we are.
Confessional #01234568
“Men in my department call in sick for the sniffles. Meanwhile, we women show up, bleeding and cramping, yet we still get the job done. Talk about tough!”
Anyone who can withstand the ups and downs of PMS and periods month after month is a total warrior.
For more relatable tales and tips about periods, check out our other blog post here. And if you’re looking for expert advice on home insemination, you can learn more from Make a Mom. For a deeper understanding of the process, visit Healthline for excellent resources.
In summary, periods bring a multitude of challenges that many of us face each month, from physical discomfort to emotional turmoil and embarrassing moments. Despite these struggles, we continue to show resilience and strength.
Keyphrase: periods struggles
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