For the first time in two months, my partner, Jake, finally had a full day off from work. We spent hours playing board games with the kids, tackled some much-needed tidying up around the house, he grilled mouthwatering steaks, and we curled up between fresh sheets to enjoy a classic movie together. It was truly wonderful.
Yet, as the night wore on, I began to feel a growing sense of restlessness. The thought of the following day loomed over me like a weight, filling me with anxiety. Lying there with Jake’s hand in mine, I couldn’t shake the feeling of dread about the solitude that awaited me. Yes, I’d be surrounded by our four kids, but I would still feel isolated and overwhelmed, struggling to be the “fun mom” I aspire to be. Tomorrow would look just like yesterday, the day before that, and the one before that.
Even when Jake is right beside me, I can’t help but feel a longing for his presence when he leaves again. While I spend most of my time as the primary caregiver, I don’t consider myself a single parent. I appreciate the financial support Jake provides, which allows me to stay home. But having a partner who works every single day isn’t always the dream scenario it’s cracked up to be.
I contribute a small income to our household too, but I manage to do it from home while working late into the night. I’m juggling motherhood, a job, and countless other responsibilities that often go unrecognized. The stress of dirty dishes, laundry, homeschooling the kids, and endless household tasks weighs heavily on me. I know I should feel grateful for the opportunity to work from home, but sometimes it seems like I’m the one getting sidelined.
It’s easy to speculate about where things may be going wrong in a relationship when you haven’t experienced it yourself. When your partner is working seven days a week, expressing frustration can feel guilt-laden. For the first time in our adult lives, Jake and I are achieving financial stability. We’re not just scraping by anymore; we have savings. We’re finally looking toward a future filled with possibilities. This is why we’re both sacrificing parts of ourselves.
Given that Jake’s work schedule is helping us reach our financial goals, I often hesitate to suggest he take more time off. I see how hard he works to provide for us. So when he is home, I refrain from pushing him to do chores, not only because he’s exhausted (let’s be real, I’m exhausted too), but because I want to cherish our time together without it revolving around work.
But I also have to remind myself of my own worth. In my quest to support him, I sometimes overlook my needs. It’s not about who does more; we can agree we both work hard. Thankfully, we are starting to reap the rewards of our dedication.
As a mother, there are many responsibilities I handle that go unnoticed until something is left undone. I carry the mental load, which means if I don’t initiate tasks, they often remain unfinished. Whether it’s starting a load of laundry at 11 p.m. or ensuring all four kids attend their doctor appointments, it’s the little things that often slip through the cracks.
While Jake leaves work each night to unwind, my work only begins after the kids are tucked into bed. For me, the obligations don’t have set hours. I can wear yesterday’s sweatpants while addressing demands for snacks and cleaning up messes. My shirt, stained from various encounters with sticky hands, is a reminder of my daily reality. Nonetheless, I too work seven days a week, just like Jake, and my needs are just as important.
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In summary, while balancing the demands of motherhood and a partner who works tirelessly, it’s crucial to recognize and honor our own contributions and mental load. We’re both working hard, and it’s important to communicate our needs to each other.
Keyphrase: Partner working seven days a week
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