47 Hilariously Raunchy Sex Jokes That Will Make You Laugh Out Loud

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Who doesn’t enjoy a cheeky, adult-themed joke? It turns out, sex jokes reign supreme in the world of humor, covering everything from playful puns about masturbation to light-hearted quips about intimate encounters. You might be surprised by how often these jokes make an appearance in everyday life. So, whether you’re at a party or just hanging out with friends, having a few risqué one-liners ready can definitely spice up the atmosphere. Remember, we’re all grown-ups here; humor about sex can be both fun and funny, both in and out of the bedroom.

If you’re ready for a good laugh, these naughty jokes and dirty riddles are sure to keep you entertained. And while you’re at it, don’t forget to check out our other hilarious posts including some on parenting and relationship humor.

  1. What did the clitoris say to the vulva? “It’s all good in the hood!”
  2. What did the penis say to the vagina? “Don’t make me cum in there!”
  3. Why did the penis lose its mind? Someone was messing with his head.
  4. What’s another name for a diaphragm? A trampoline for dicks.
  5. What did the banana say to the vibrator? “You’re the one shaking? I’m about to get eaten!”
  6. What does Popeye use as a lubricant? Olive Oyl.
  7. Why is Santa’s sack so massive? He only comes once a year!
  8. What’s better than pansies on a piano? Tulips on your organ!
  9. What did the penis say to the condom? “Cover me, I’m going in.”
  10. What’s the similarity between winning the lottery and sleeping with triplets? In both cases, you can say you’ve had six identical balls.
  11. What did Adam say to Eve? “Stand back. I don’t know how big this thing’s gonna grow.”
  12. What do a penis and a Rubik’s Cube have in common? The more you play with it, the harder it gets.
  13. My girlfriend mentioned she always smokes after sex. I told her we should use some lube next time.
  14. What’s the main difference between a pregnant woman and a lightbulb? You can unscrew a lightbulb.
  15. Why did Popeye punch the Pope? He heard he went to Mount Olive.

I just had an intimate encounter in an elevator. It was great on so many levels! What’s the speed limit in bed? It’s 68; once you hit 69, you have to turn around.

What did the woman say when her boyfriend cried after sex? “I had you pegged for someone else.” What do you get when you screw a textbook? A D in math.

My wife said if 1,000 people upvote this joke, she’ll try anal right then and there. So, don’t vote until Tuesday; she’s on a business trip. After a decade, the police are still chasing the Viagra thief. He’s just so hard to catch.

Convincing my partner to take Viagra was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done. What do you do when you come across an elephant in the jungle? Wipe it off and say you’re sorry.

Life is like a penis—often hard for no reason! Why is a one-night stand like a snowstorm? You never know when he’s coming, how many inches you’ll get, or how long it’ll last.

A husband is supposed to make his wife’s panties wet, not her eyes. A wife is supposed to make her husband’s dick hard, not his life.

Why do women wear panties with flowers on them? In loving memory of all the faces that have been buried there.

Kid 1: “Hey, I bet you’re still a virgin.” Kid 2: “Yeah, I was a virgin until last night.” Kid 1: “As if.” Kid 2: “Yeah, just ask your sister.” Kid 1: “I don’t have a sister.” Kid 2: “You will in about nine months.”

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In summary, these 47 sex jokes are perfect for breaking the ice or adding some humor to your gatherings. With a blend of cheekiness and wit, they’re sure to resonate with anyone who appreciates a good laugh.

Keyphrase: “raunchy sex jokes”

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