Recently, I found myself giving my 12-year-old son, Ethan, a stern talking-to after he got in trouble during his gardening class. It turns out he and a friend decided to wander off and started hitting random trees with a school rake, trying to break it. The principal caught them red-handed—and to add to the embarrassment, his mother, who teaches that very class, had to deal with it.
Now, in the grand scheme of junior high antics, this is definitely on the milder side of mischief. Still, it was quite the awkward moment for his mom. I let Ethan know just how lucky he was that she didn’t retaliate more forcefully, and as he stared at the floor, I wrapped up the conversation with, “What you did was not okay, but I want you to remember—I love you.”
This isn’t the first time one of my kids has found themselves in hot water, and it certainly won’t be the last. The phrase “I love you” is a staple in our family dynamic. Every morning when I head out for work, I squeeze my kids in a hug and say it. The same goes for when I come back home, and just before they go to bed. For over a decade, I can’t recall a day passing without expressing my love for them. I’m not sure if there’s such a thing as saying it too much, but I do know that my own childhood was devoid of those words.
My upbringing was marked by instability, with a father who fluctuated in and out of jail due to addiction and a mother struggling to raise us alone. But when I was 14, I moved in with my grandmother, who showered me with love—often telling me she loved me three or four times a day. Even during lectures, she would always finish with, “I love you.” No matter my actions, she made me feel loved.
In high school, I used to feel embarrassed when she proclaimed her love in front of my friends, but now I cherish those memories. Her unwavering love stands in stark contrast to the uncertainty I sometimes felt about my parents’ feelings for me. It’s that certainty that drives me to give my children the same gift.
I express my love even when I’m upset with them. It’s important for me that they know, regardless of their choices or actions, my love remains constant. It’s the bedrock of our relationship, a safety net that will always be there for them.
That doesn’t mean I shy away from holding them accountable. I have high expectations and provide constructive criticism when they fall short. My children are aware that my love is not blind; it’s a robust foundation that supports them through both triumphs and challenges.
Returning to Ethan, when I told him I loved him after reprimanding him, he didn’t roll his eyes or argue. He simply looked up and said, “I love you too, Dad.” In that moment, it felt like he understood that my actions came from a place of love. It took time to cultivate this kind of relationship, but I’m certain we wouldn’t be here without that foundation of love.
For more engaging discussions about parenting and love, check out this related post at Home Insemination Kit. And if you’re looking for authoritative resources on pregnancy and home insemination, visit Make a Mom and Cleveland Clinic.
In summary, expressing love to your children daily is crucial. It builds a strong foundation that helps them feel secure, no matter the circumstances. It’s a simple yet powerful gesture that can make all the difference in your child’s life.
Keyphrase: daily expressions of love for children
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