As a parent, you quickly learn that life with young children comes with its own brand of chaos. You might find the milk in the cupboard, shaking your head in disbelief as you pour it down the sink. The aluminum foil might hide in the refrigerator, only to be discovered three days later behind the grapes. And let’s not even start on the microwave, where your morning coffee might sit, cold and forgotten, just waiting for you to take a sip.
In this whirlwind, things don’t just end up in strange places—they often go missing altogether. Keys vanish, important documents get buried, and you can find an endless supply of pencils and paperclips until you actually need one. Sometimes, even the family pet goes missing, sparking a neighborhood search.
When I became a mother, my own mother shared her secret sanctuary: a sunny spot on the floor between her bed and window, a place where we would never think to search for her. In those moments of intentional “disappearance,” she found a sliver of peace.
But too often, we mothers lose ourselves inadvertently. What happens when we forget who we are beyond the title of “Mom”? When our identities become so intertwined with our children’s lives that we lose touch with our own interests and friendships?
This is precisely why I advocate for a girlfriends’ weekend. A few hours away can be refreshing, but a few days allows us to reconnect and recharge. While some might view it as self-indulgent to escape with friends for a weekend—akin to having the whole cake instead of just a slice—others may worry about leaving their children behind.
I was nervous before my first weekend away, sure I’d return to a house in disarray, kids covered in dirt, and a kitchen filled with the remnants of chaos. Instead, I walked back into a well-kept home, happy kids, and a husband who had even managed to freshen the paint on the front porch.
While he was busy impressing me, I had flown from Los Angeles to Cabo San Lucas, Mexico, for three glorious nights with my friends. If you choose the right companions, no one will expect you to cater to them. You can savor your coffee without interruption, lounge by the pool with a drink in hand, and remember your own name, as someone at the hotel will call you by it.
You’ll leave the beach with sand on your feet instead of in your car, enjoy a leisurely two-hour dinner without fretting over someone’s vegetable intake, and sleep in without the usual morning interruptions. You’ll learn more about your friends—like who secretly listens to Christmas music in June or who loves playing Canasta. You’ll have the chance to listen deeply to a friend sharing about her ailing mother, and you’ll rediscover the joy of reading without distractions.
This time away will help you realize that while your kids need you, they also thrive in your absence. You’ll return home with small tokens from your trip—perhaps coconut soaps or cute bracelets—and your children will be thrilled to see you. They will notice the renewed sparkle in your eyes, and you’ll remember who you are beyond motherhood.
You’ll call that friend to check in on her mom, invite another over for a game night, and finally carve out time to finish that book you started ages ago. Your kids will see you laughing again, and they’ll join you in your joyful moments. And yes, you may still find your coffee in the microwave before dinner, but you’ll know where you stand in the beautiful chaos of life.
For more insights into motherhood and the importance of self-care, check out this informative piece on artificial insemination at home from our other blog. If you’re looking for resources on family planning, this link provides excellent information on pregnancy and home insemination.
In summary, a girlfriends’ weekend can be a transformative experience for mothers. It allows you to reconnect with yourself, your friendships, and your sense of joy. So go ahead, embrace the opportunity, and come back revitalized and ready to tackle the beautiful chaos of motherhood once again.