As a mother to 107 children, I find myself in a unique position. Out of all these kids, only one—my delightful 3-year-old daughter, Mia—was born from my own body. I also have a remarkable 9-year-old stepdaughter, Lily, and 105 twelve-year-old students who I wholeheartedly embrace as part of my family.
I spend more time with my students than many of their parents do, much like how my daughters’ teachers spend time with them. This is simply the nature of our work schedules; there simply aren’t enough hours in the day for everything to balance out. This raises the inevitable “Mom and Teacher Mom” guilt—I genuinely love each of my students, and once they step into my classroom, they become part of my extended family. However, they aren’t kids I can take home with me (though I occasionally wish I could).
In my teaching environment, many of my students, despite their young age, find themselves taking on caregiving responsibilities for younger siblings, cousins, or neighbors after school. Unfortunately, this reflects a harsh reality where many parents or guardians must juggle multiple jobs and shifts just to make ends meet. Despite their hard work, life remains a struggle for them.
Many of my students come from different countries, seeking better educational opportunities and safer living conditions for their children. Some parents even make the difficult decision to send their kids to the U.S. to live with relatives, believing that it will ultimately benefit them, even at the cost of family unity.
Throughout my teaching career, I’ve encountered colleagues who criticize parents for being unreachable or uninvolved. However, I teach in a school where most of my students face economic hardships. Let me be clear: Poverty is not a crime.
My maternal instincts drive me to want to be a nurturing figure for all 107 kids, but there’s only one of me and a limited amount of time in each day. I run an after-school club that lasts only 45 minutes each week, yet even my more challenging students look forward to that time with me. “Miss, can we stay a little longer? Just 15 more minutes?” they plead. I understand their perspective—who wouldn’t want to stay a bit longer in a safe, caring environment? The reality, though, is that those extra minutes push back the time I get to spend with my daughters, Mia and Lily, and then it’s back to home responsibilities like cleaning and preparing dinner. And yes, I have a husband who needs my attention too.
Despite the challenges, I wouldn’t trade my career for anything. It’s fulfilling work, and when I help students who have a “bad reputation” turn their image around, it brings me immense joy. I have always believed that the children who crave love often express it in the most unloving ways. Therefore, I make an effort to connect with each one individually. I keep tissues and Band-Aids in my classroom, always ready to lend a listening ear or a comforting hug when they’re upset.
At the end of the day, I take my dual roles as a mother and a teacher very seriously. Yet, there are moments when I find it hard to convince myself that my own children need me more than my students do. Some of them come from loving homes, while others, through no fault of their own, lack the sense of security that my daughters enjoy. It truly does take a village to raise a child.
To the parents of my wonderful students, thank you for trusting me to play a part in your children’s lives.
Warmly,
~ “Miss”
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Summary:
In this heartfelt reflection, Jamie Collins shares her experience as a mother to both her biological and classroom children, highlighting the emotional complexities of balancing her roles as a mother and a teacher. She emphasizes the challenges faced by her economically disadvantaged students and the deep connections she forms with them. Jamie expresses a profound desire to nurture all her kids while grappling with the demands of family life.
Keyphrase: Nurturing Children in Education
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