By: Lila Thompson
Updated: September 30, 2020
Originally Published: April 1, 2018
It’s no secret that many boys today are not receiving the emotional support they need from adults. For far too long, societal norms have dictated that boys must be “tough” and “strong,” leading them to believe that expressing emotions is a sign of weakness. This conditioning often results in boys struggling to articulate feelings like sadness and frustration, as they have learned to repress these emotions. Bottling up feelings is never healthy, and it’s time we change this narrative.
Research indicates that boys actually require more emotional support than girls, yet due to ingrained gender stereotypes, we are failing to provide it. There are inherent biological differences in brain development between boys and girls, with boys being more emotionally vulnerable even before birth. Unfortunately, these differences aren’t discussed enough, even though they offer crucial insights into the emotional support boys need.
A study by Dr. Mark Newton titled “The Fragile Male,” published in 2000, reveals that males face disadvantages starting from conception. Male embryos are more susceptible to maternal stress, and male fetuses have a higher risk of complications like cerebral palsy. After birth, boys often display elevated cortisol levels due to stress from neonatal assessments, and they face a greater risk of birth trauma and inadequate caregiving. Their brains may be less developed than girls’ by up to six weeks at birth, and this slower pace of development continues as they grow. As Dr. Newton points out, “Caring for boys is often more challenging, increasing the likelihood of developmental issues.”
Boys can sometimes appear wild and uncontrollable, which can be exhausting for parents. However, Dr. Emily Carter of the UCLA Medical Center emphasizes the importance of nurturing healthy relationships between infant boys and their caregivers. He notes that a secure attachment with responsive parents during the first year is vital for boys’ emotional development. This means investing time in bonding, offering physical affection, and being present when they need support.
Boys are often taught early on that showing emotions is unacceptable. This can lead to long-term challenges in their relationships with peers and others. Jessica Lee, a child development expert, explains that adhering to outdated beliefs about emotional expression harms boys and creates barriers to healthy emotional outlets. Emotions are a universal human experience, not confined to one gender. As parents, it’s essential to challenge these stereotypes, even when they seem ingrained.
When my son feels upset, I make it a point to kneel down to his level and connect with him eye-to-eye. I acknowledge his feelings, saying something like, “I see that you’re feeling sad; how can I help?” Sometimes, just letting him cry is necessary, and guiding him to take calming breaths can be beneficial.
Neglecting to recognize boys’ feelings and their need for healthy emotional expression perpetuates cycles of toxic masculinity. There’s ample scientific evidence supporting the importance of fostering emotional health in boys, and we must prioritize this in their upbringing. If you care about your son, encourage him to embrace his emotions rather than suppress them.
For more insights on parenting and the emotional needs of children, check out this helpful guide on home insemination from Make a Mom. For additional information on pregnancy, Healthline offers a wealth of resources.
In summary, it’s crucial that we actively address the emotional needs of our boys. By fostering an environment where they feel safe to express their emotions, we can help them develop into well-rounded, emotionally secure individuals.
Keyphrase: emotional needs of boys
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