From a young age, I knew I was attracted to women. I discovered my feelings for women when I was just 11, while also being head over heels for men. Although I’ve had more relationships with men, that doesn’t change the validity of my feelings for women.
I was in a committed relationship with a man and we welcomed a child together. However, my attraction to women remains strong, and I proudly identify as a bisexual woman. My role as a mother doesn’t erase my identity; it simply adds another layer to it. Whether I choose to date men or women, my bisexuality is not conditional on my relationship status.
One of the most challenging aspects of embracing my bisexuality has been the struggle for recognition and acceptance. As a teenager, many friends dismissed my feelings as a mere phase, unaware that I had been grappling with my identity since early adolescence. When people hear that I like women but mostly date men, they often question or invalidate my feelings.
Even when I didn’t vocalize my attraction, it was always present. I didn’t hang up posters of pop icons like Meghan Trainor simply because they were famous; I admired them because I found them genuinely attractive. I kept these feelings hidden, fearing that others would dismiss them. My bedroom became a sanctuary where I could be true to myself, away from judgment.
My only relationship with a woman occurred when I was 17. Though it was brief and mainly physical, it was a pivotal moment for me, affirming the feelings I had suppressed for so long. My friends, however, brushed it off, which eroded my confidence and led me to focus solely on relationships with men thereafter.
When I disclosed my bisexuality to men, it often led to fetishization or misunderstanding. Consequently, I kept my identity largely to myself, except around those I trusted. However, everything shifted last October when I decided to come out publicly to my family and friends. The support I received was overwhelmingly positive. To my surprise, many friends confided that they too were bisexual but felt unable to express it due to fear of rejection. These conversations were mutually comforting, as we realized we were not alone in our struggles.
Now that I’m single and open to dating again, I find myself considering the possibility of a relationship with a woman, should the opportunity arise. With a young child at home, dating is complicated, but I’m keeping my heart open. There’s a woman who has caught my eye, even though she lives across the country—making a relationship unlikely. Nevertheless, she knows about my child and my past relationships with men. How she reacts remains uncertain, but simply expressing my feelings to her is a significant step in my journey.
I sometimes ponder how to explain a potential same-sex relationship to my young son. He’s never witnessed me in a romantic relationship since his father and I split when he was a baby. While I’ve taught him about various forms of love, I worry about how he might perceive my attraction to women.
The future is unpredictable when it comes to my romantic life, but one thing is clear: my bisexuality is unwavering. Whether I end up in a relationship with a woman or a man, it doesn’t diminish who I am. My identity is not defined by my partners but rooted deeply within my heart.
To all the bisexual mothers out there who might feel less than whole, I want you to know you are not alone. You are still who you are, no matter your circumstances.
For more insights into pregnancy and home insemination, check out this excellent resource on artificial insemination. If you’re curious about exploring options, this post on at-home insemination kits is a great read, as well as this one which discusses the Cryobaby kit.
Summary:
Being a mother does not diminish my identity as a bisexual woman. Embracing my bisexuality has been a journey filled with challenges, especially in gaining acceptance from others. As I navigate the complexities of dating while parenting, I reaffirm that my bisexuality is an integral part of who I am, regardless of my relationships. To all bisexual mothers, know that your identity remains valid, and you are not alone in your experiences.
Keyphrase: Being a bisexual mother
Tags: “home insemination kit”, “home insemination syringe”, “self insemination”