As someone who has battled depression and anxiety throughout my life, I found myself susceptible to postpartum depression (PPD). I have three children, and each time, I experienced postpartum challenges in different ways. With my first, it was anxiety that led me to the doctor for every little cough or rash. After my second, the feelings were more akin to the “Baby Blues,” and after my third, I faced overwhelming guilt and shame.
One consistent response I received from well-meaning friends and family was, “It’s just hormones. You are so blessed!” While their intentions were good, those words stung every time.
In our society, we often overlook the emotional struggles of new mothers. When a mom expresses that she’s tired, instead of empathy, she gets laughter and comments about how all mothers go through it. Unlike during pregnancy, when people ask how you’re feeling, the arrival of a baby often leads to invasive questions about your body and choices, which suddenly feel like public domain.
Experiencing postpartum depression can feel like being on fire while everyone around you is celebrating. You know you should feel joy, yet it’s difficult to appreciate your blessings when you’re engulfed in flames. Time flies by, your baby grows, and you feel like you’re merely existing amid your struggles.
Next time you talk to a new mom, resist the urge to simply remind her of her blessings—she’s already aware. Instead, help restore her sense of identity beyond being a mother. Bring her a meal, assist with the baby so she can take a shower or catch up on sleep. Plants don’t win lotteries, and lampposts don’t count their blessings. If you truly want to support a new mother, acknowledge her pain and help her reconnect with her humanity.
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Summary
Postpartum depression can be a heavy burden for new mothers, and it’s essential to approach them with empathy rather than platitudes. Instead of reminding them of their blessings, offer support that helps them feel human again.
Keyphrase: postpartum depression support
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