Sometimes, I Embrace the Role of the ‘Mean Mom,’ and I’m Okay With That

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As a parent, I often find myself on the receiving end of my kids’ frustrations. Whether it’s reminding them to tidy up the bathroom puddles or cutting their gaming time short, there are plenty of reasons for their eye rolls. Occasionally, I even dare to ask them to pick up after our dog or take their dishes to the sink.

There are days when I feel like a strict mom, a nagging mom, or even, dare I say, the meanest mom on the planet. However, I generally consider myself a pretty relaxed parent. I say yes to screen time, let them indulge in junk food, and allow for later bedtimes. I’m not the type to stress over their grades as long as they’re putting in effort and showing respect to their teachers. I overlook the chaos in their rooms and don’t get worked up about the toilet seat being left up (which happens quite frequently).

But, because I want to raise kind, respectful children, there are times when I have to draw the line and enforce some rules. This inevitably leads to whining, complaints, and tears. They often compare themselves to their friends who supposedly get to play Xbox for hours (which is not true), or they assure me that homework can wait until morning (spoiler: it can’t). They might even claim that Johnny down the street doesn’t have to pick up after a dog (but Johnny doesn’t even have a dog).

It’s safe to say my kids are frequently irked with me. While I maintain a close relationship with them and strive to be their safe haven, they often feel annoyed or frustrated by my expectations. Yes, being labeled the “mean mom” can sting, especially when I find myself arguing about basic hygiene practices like brushing teeth or showering. Still, I accept this role because I recognize its necessity in the grand scheme of parenting.

I genuinely want a healthy relationship with my kids. I desire their love, respect, and trust. But I also don’t need to be their friend. As their mother, my primary role is to guide them, not to indulge their every wish. I refuse to raise self-absorbed, inconsiderate individuals who think the world revolves around them. It’s vital for them to learn kindness and consideration, and sometimes that means I have to be “mean.”

I don’t need a friendship with my children, nor do I particularly want one. Let’s be real: I wouldn’t allow a friend to act the way they sometimes do. As their parent, it’s my responsibility to help them develop into respectful and empathetic human beings. This means I’ll ruffle their feathers from time to time, and they may think I’m the meanest mom ever.

Sometimes, I annoy them by singing loudly in front of their friends or insisting they stay in their seats during the carpool line. I won’t let them live in chaos, which means enforcing showers and tooth brushing. Occasionally, I even have the audacity to prepare a home-cooked meal or tidy up their baseball cards, all of which can trigger eye rolls and complaints. And don’t even get me started on the consequences for their misbehavior—those will definitely earn me a few tallies in the “mean mom” department.

I find countless ways to irritate my kids daily. For instance, I’ve managed to annoy them simply by adding cheese to a grilled cheese sandwich or cutting it into squares instead of triangles. And if you want a guaranteed way to frustrate a child, just clean up the Legos they left strewn across the kitchen floor for days because they were “still using them.”

But you know what? Annoying our kids is just part of the job. Embracing the “mean” role comes with the territory of parenthood, and it’s a privilege I take seriously.

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In Summary

Being the ‘mean mom’ is not only okay—it’s essential for raising considerate, respectful children. It may lead to occasional frustration, but it’s all part of the parenting journey.

Keyphrase: Mean Mom Parenting

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