One of my favorite internet memes features a dog sipping tea while wearing an adorable little hat, sitting calmly at a table engulfed in flames. “This is fine,” he declares. Honestly, it cracks me up and resonates with me on a profound level. As a perpetually tired mom of two young kids, my life often feels like a series of mini-disasters demanding immediate attention. I wake up to the sound of crying children, and I go to bed to the same soundtrack. In between, it feels like I’m attempting to herd cats.
I’m not complaining. Being a mother was always my dream, and now I’m living it. I adore my children with every ounce of my being. Yet, like many moms, I’m also endlessly fatigued, emotionally strained, and mentally drained. Parenthood is a strange paradox; my life is overflowing with love, yet I’m often at my wit’s end. This is my reality, and I’m okay with it.
However, it leaves me puzzled when someone asks how I’m doing. What do they really want to know? The whole truth? Just the nice bits? How much are they prepared to hear?
How am I doing?
Well, as a mother, I’ve averaged four hours of sleep for the past three years, and let’s be real—I can’t even remember the last time I washed my hair. This morning, my favorite blue jeans wouldn’t button, and the baby’s diaper just exploded in her car seat.
How am I doing? I attempted to clean that mess out of her car seat with a Starbucks napkin, but it tore. I would’ve reached for a wet wipe, but the last one was used to tackle a gigantic dried booger off my purse. Yes, poop and boogers are part of my everyday life.
How am I doing? My husband and I are like two ships passing in the night, high-fiving as we tag-team our little ones. By the end of the day, we collapse into bed—too exhausted to talk, too drained for intimacy. Even if we weren’t that tired, I’d still be covered in all sorts of mess. How can I feel sexy after a day like that?
How am I doing? Raising a family of four isn’t cheap. Each morning, I wake up acutely aware that these tiny humans depend on me for everything. It’s my job to keep them safe, change their diapers, and eventually pay for college. Just saying that word sends shivers down my spine.
But really, how am I doing? Do you genuinely want to know?
I’m fine.
But “fine” has taken on a whole new meaning. Ask any mom, and she’ll tell you that “fine” means we are living our dream life, even though it can feel burdensome. We recognize the incredible privilege it is to care for these little souls, yet sometimes it feels overwhelmingly heavy. “Fine” means we may not even recognize the person staring back at us in the mirror because so much has changed. Still, this is what we wanted. This is the life we chose.
“Fine” means being a mom is incredibly challenging, and from the outside, it might look like our lives are on fire. Well, they kind of are. But despite the chaos and the cost of motherhood, we are grateful.
“Fine” means we wholeheartedly identify with that little dog, surrounded by flames yet wearing a goofy grin and a silly hat. This chaotic, exhausting life is everything we ever dreamed of. We are exactly where we want to be, and yes, we are fine. This is fine.
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In summary, being a mom is a beautiful yet exhausting journey filled with ups and downs. When we say we’re “fine,” it’s a complex blend of love, chaos, and the ongoing challenge of balancing everything life throws our way.
Keyphrase: What Moms Really Mean When We Say ‘I’m Fine’
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