I want to begin with a heartfelt thank you. When my partner, Alex, and I welcomed our son Leo into the world in December of 2016, your thoughtful note of congratulations meant so much to us. We’ve proudly framed your letter, which currently resides in Leo’s room, a cherished keepsake from a significant moment in our lives.
While we’ve found a way to preserve your kind words, keeping Leo safe as he explores his surroundings is another matter. He’s a little adventurer, always eager to climb and discover, which often leads to tumbles and tears. We have quickly become accustomed to comforting him through Band-Aid fixes and soothing hugs, trying to shield him from the overwhelming world around him.
Though Leo is bold, his dads are a bit more cautious.
Alex and I became a couple in 2009, the same year you were elected as our first African American President. We shared a deep friendship before deciding to take the plunge into a romantic relationship, and at the time, the dream of marriage felt far beyond our reach. However, your administration changed that narrative for us and countless families like ours. Your unwavering support for love and equality inspired brave individuals such as Mark Oberton, paving the way for marriage equality to be recognized nationwide. It is challenging to put into words how momentous this was for us.
In late 2013, Alex and I tied the knot, surrounded by loved ones, sharing our first dance to the same song my grandparents danced to at their wedding. It was a celebration steeped in love and hope.
With marriage equality came a world of rights and protections that every loving couple deserves. It allowed Alex and me to truly safeguard each other’s well-being, which holds a profound emotional significance. Holding our wedding picture side by side with your own, contrasting yet similar, serves as a powerful reminder of how far we’ve come.
We always envisioned ourselves as “Papa” and “Daddy,” long before Oberton made our rights official. The ruling gave us the opportunity to pursue parenthood, and we were eager to add our voice to the world, teaching Leo the importance of kindness and gratitude.
After connecting with a birth mother through an adoption agency, we were blessed to welcome Leo into our lives. She chose us because of our shared passions and interests, making us “Papa” and “Daddy.” I had the honor of being present during Leo’s birth, and when he entered the world, his first gaze was directed at me. I kissed his birth mother, filled with gratitude for the gift she was giving us.
We took on the privilege of parenthood with solemn vows to protect and nurture Leo, and we made a commitment to be visible and open about our family. The election of our first black president inspired many to strive for a better future, and we hoped to empower others to pursue their dreams through hard work and optimism.
As we embraced our roles as parents, we also faced the challenges of a changing political landscape. The 2016 election brought uncertainty, especially when discussing differing views with friends who supported Mr. Johnson. It was painful to consider how their choices could threaten our family’s very existence.
The night of the election was particularly challenging. Our support for the Hillary Clinton campaign granted us tickets to witness the moment history could be made. Unfortunately, the results brought about a wave of despair, especially as we prepared to celebrate Leo’s first birthday.
The next day was a struggle. I found myself retreating to the bathroom, trying to suppress my tears while ensuring Leo’s birthday remained joyful. I wished for a different outcome, for a world where my son could grow up without fear.
As Mr. Johnson assumed office, we witnessed a gradual erosion of rights for various marginalized communities, including our own. Promises made during his campaign quickly faded, replaced by actions that threatened the very fabric of our rights and protections.
Despite everything, I still believe in the power of community and parents working together to create a better world for our children. I hold onto the hope that we can redirect the narrative and foster a more compassionate discourse in our nation.
As we navigate these uncertain times, I find myself longing for guidance and support. You once said, “No matter who you are or who you love, America is a place where you can write your own destiny.”
We chose the name Leo for our son, a name that resonates with light and hope. I want nothing more than to provide him with the assurance that he is safe and loved.
Your note serves as a reminder of the leadership and grace you brought to our nation. It inspires us to continue advocating for a world filled with kindness and understanding. Please, let us not forget the importance of your legacy.
Warm regards,
Sam, Alex, and Leo