Let’s have a little chat. Frankly, I’m at my wit’s end with this never-ending game of “Where is my stuff?” I may be a whiz at multitasking and can spot you sneaking into my candy stash from a mile away, but I’m not your personal treasure map. Yes, I know you think I have a sixth sense for locating missing items, and I appreciate the admiration, but let’s get this straight: I am not a magical being who knows the whereabouts of every sock and snack in this house.
Now, when you’re practically inside the fridge, asking if we have milk while the handle is almost touching your nose, my patience begins to wear thin. I can only keep my cool for so long, and we all know what happens next—I lose my temper, and nobody wants that.
You’ve all become experts at misplacing your belongings, and it’s high time you took on some responsibility. Just because you assume I know where everything is doesn’t mean I want that burden. Seriously, I have far better things to do than play hide-and-seek with your possessions.
And just to clarify, if you’re looking for the butter, it’s where it’s always been—in the butter dish in the cupboard. If it’s empty, grab a new stick from the fridge. If there’s no butter in the fridge, guess what? We’re out of butter. Got it?
I am not intentionally rearranging items around the house to keep you guessing. I have my own life to manage, and I certainly don’t have time to exercise my brain like this. I don’t know if you genuinely believe I can locate your left sneaker or if you’re just trying to drive me up the wall. But here’s the deal: I don’t know where your things are, and I frequently misplace my own car keys and forget what day it is.
Instead of yelling, “Mom! Where are my sweatpants?!” why not invest that energy into actually looking for them? How many times do I have to lose my cool before you realize this isn’t working for anyone? If you took a moment to organize your belongings and put them back where they belong, you wouldn’t be losing so much stuff. Just a thought.
I feel your frustration when you’re asking for something that’s right under your nose. But this time, I must step back and let you figure it out. I’ve raised you all to be capable individuals who can find whatever they need, even those tricky colored pencils. Show me what you’ve got, kiddos!
I’m busy keeping your lives running smoothly, making sure your social calendars are full to avoid boredom—a talent I’m quite proud of. So, when you ask me to help find your library book, it’s simply not feasible.
Now, speaking of things that are missing—where on earth are my keys?