Updated: March 30, 2021
Originally Published: April 18, 2016
The excitement of pregnancy often leads to various conversations, starting with enthusiastic remarks like, “Congratulations on your pregnancy!” I respond with a smile, even if I’m battling nausea. Soon, the dialogue shifts to topics such as the baby’s gender, due date, and potential names. But then, the conversation takes a turn into a realm filled with judgment.
“Have you considered how you’ll deliver?” or “Do you have a birth plan?” are questions that often arise. For those who have experienced childbirth, these inquiries may seem trivial. After all, it’s rare for a birth to unfold exactly as planned. I typically brush off these questions from those without firsthand experience. They wouldn’t understand. However, it’s the well-meaning parents who can be more challenging.
Many of them, influenced by their own natural birth experiences, seem compelled to advocate for this approach. It’s puzzling—what drives them to push for a “natural” ideal? I sometimes wonder if there’s an underground movement promoting natural childbirth, complete with Facebook invites for essential oil classes or breathing techniques.
Honestly, I’m weary of discussing my delivery preferences. Why is there a need to visualize my birth experience? I won’t conform to the expectations of others. Yes, I want an epidural, and when I share this, the atmosphere shifts. I often receive a condescending response: “Oh, have you thought about natural alternatives?” or “Your body was designed for this; you should embrace it.”
Let’s pause there. If that’s your argument, go ahead and sit in my son’s time-out chair to ponder your thoughts. My body can do many things—like endure menopause and, eventually, die. Should I embrace those too?
And then there’s the age-old argument: “Women have been giving birth since the dawn of time. Anesthesia is a modern invention.” To that, I ask: have you met my great-grandmother? I doubt she would have turned down an epidural while enduring the agony of back labor, all in the name of “natural.”
The only scenario in which I might have a natural birth would be if circumstances prevent me from reaching a hospital, the anesthesiologist has an off day, or my partner decides to handcuff me to the bed in a masochistic fit. Anything is possible in labor, and it often defies planning.
Motherhood encompasses many challenges, but intentionally forgoing an epidural is not one I wish to face. I respect those who choose natural childbirth; their strength amazes me. After my previous experience, where I practically begged for death amidst the overwhelming pain, I cannot justify rejecting the advancements of modern medicine.
As I prepare for the arrival of my second child, I humor the thought that the experience might be different, less painful. However, I see no reason to deny myself the benefits of modern technology. There are plenty of aspects of motherhood to embrace, but for me, the epidural is non-negotiable.
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In summary, while the journey of childbirth is personal and unique to each individual, my choice to seek pain relief through an epidural is one that I stand by. The complexities of motherhood are vast, but I will not shy away from modern advancements that can ease the experience.
Keyphrase: Natural Birth Choices
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