Long Hair, No Worries: My Decision to Let My Sons Keep Their Locks

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It’s not uncommon for people to mistake my sons for girls, and when that happens, I gently correct them, using “he” or “him” instead of “she.” Often, the individual looks mortified and mutters an apology, leaving the sentiment hanging as if implying that my sons appearing feminine is somehow wrong.

I usually brush it off with a friendly, “No worries!” After all, having long hair means dealing with such misinterpretations—it’s simply part of the experience.

From a young age, I’ve always appreciated long hairstyles on men. I often encouraged my college partners to grow their hair out and spent years trying to persuade my husband to skip the barber. I find long hair on little boys particularly charming, which is why I was determined to grow my sons’ hair long.

My eldest son, however, nearly put a stop to my plans. He was born with little to no hair, and it took almost a year for any growth to appear. When it did, it resembled a fluffy, miniature Einstein. My second son, on the other hand, has beautiful, straight hair that cascades past his shoulders, resembling a surfer. The youngest is still developing his hair, but he’s already showing signs of adorable beachy curls. I couldn’t be more thrilled.

Of course, not everyone shares my enthusiasm. My mother and in-laws often express their preferences for more conventional, neatly trimmed hairstyles for boys. My in-laws are polite enough to keep their opinions to themselves, but my mother openly wishes she could take the kids to a barber shop. Such objections often stem from traditional gender norms where boys sport short hair while girls have long tresses, following the classic narrative of Dick and Jane. I choose to ignore these views.

There have been other criticisms regarding my sons’ hair choices. Once, someone remarked that they looked unkempt. While I found humor in the comment at the time, I later realized that a simple trim could improve the overall appearance without sacrificing length. My eldest’s hair had become a bit wild, so reluctantly, I trimmed it to allow the healthier hair underneath to flourish. He looked quite different afterward but seemed content with his shorter style, claiming it would eventually grow long.

The crucial factor here is that my sons enjoy their hair. My oldest is excited about growing it out, and my middle son, who proudly sports his shoulder-length hair, confidently states he plans to let it grow down to his knees. The youngest isn’t old enough to voice his preferences yet, but when he is, I’ll certainly take his wishes into account. If he decides he wants a haircut, I will respect his choice, even if it brings me to tears.

My middle child understands that long hair requires some upkeep. We need to be cautious about things getting tangled in it. If that happens, a bath is in order, complete with washing and conditioning. Each morning, I brush his hair, and on some occasions, I even straighten it. He claims to enjoy it, and he knows that he must be still during this process.

Sometimes, other children mistakenly refer to them as girls or question why the “girls” are wearing Star Wars shirts. We correct them, and for the most part, they understand. Thankfully, my boys have yet to encounter any unkind remarks regarding their hair, possibly because long-haired boys are becoming more commonplace, or perhaps because we associate with those who embrace a more relaxed lifestyle.

I adore their flowing locks. What matters most to me is that my sons have chosen their hairstyle, free from societal expectations. Their hair is a reflection of their individuality—long, beautiful, and distinct from the norm. And that’s truly wonderful.

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Summary

This article reflects on a mother’s journey in embracing her sons’ long hair, despite societal norms and family opinions. The narrative emphasizes the importance of self-expression and individuality, highlighting that hair is a personal choice that can be beautiful in its uniqueness.

Keyphrase: Long hair boys parenting
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