I’ve been labeled a “selfish mom.”
Yes, that’s right. Each day, I carve out time for myself, ensuring my needs are on par with those of my husband and child. This realization sparked a heated discussion on my social media, where the comments ranged from:
- “You’re a bad mother for not dedicating every moment to your family,”
- “Nice, you’re a mom who takes time for herself. I focus on my kids first,”
- “You should be ashamed for prioritizing your own needs. You’re selfish.”
Well, I proudly own that label.
As a working mom, I juggle over 50 hours a week at my job, manage a fitness business, assist my husband with his expanding masonry and construction company, and care for a toddler (with a newborn on the way), a spirited German shepherd, and maintain a four-bedroom home along with several gardens. It’s a full plate every day, and I cherish these responsibilities.
When I hear the term “selfish” thrown at me for taking just 30 minutes daily to write, exercise, or even do my nails, I have to strongly disagree.
In my teenage years, I would have unleashed my frustration at those comments, but motherhood has taught me to respond differently. Instead of reacting in anger, I just remind myself that those moments of solitude are vital. It’s merely 30 minutes out of 1,440 in a day—hardly a significant amount. This time allows me to decompress, clear my mind, and process the day’s events—whether it’s a colleague’s remark, my boss’s demands, or my toddler’s latest meltdown.
This “selfish” time is essential for recharging my mental batteries, which get drained quickly in the chaos of daily life. I’ve realized that when I neglect this time, I become more stressed, anxious, and irritable—often critical of others.
While I often put my family first, I now ensure I carve out those precious minutes. I deserve it, and so does every mother out there.
I used to wonder why so many women sharing similar life challenges seemed happier and more content. I had the façade of the American dream but still felt unfulfilled. I didn’t allow myself any time for solitude, running from task to task without pause.
Now, I’ve learned to let some chores slide. Sometimes, I opt for leftovers instead of cooking, just to grab those 30 minutes for myself. And let me tell you, it’s been transformative! Since I’ve embraced “me” time, I’ve lost 25 pounds, improved my skin, become a more organized planner, advanced in my job, and genuinely enjoy quality time with my family. The simple act of prioritizing myself has made me a better wife, mother, employee, and friend.
So, go ahead—indulge in a bubble bath, take a jog on that brisk autumn evening, paint your toenails, or savor a chocolate bar with a glass of wine as the sun sets. You deserve it too!
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In summary, taking time for yourself as a mom isn’t selfish; it’s necessary for your well-being and enhances your ability to nurture your family. Embracing this truth can lead to a happier, healthier you, which ultimately benefits everyone around you.
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