Menu: Parenting
By Jamie Parker
Updated: July 2, 2020
Originally Published: September 30, 2015
Reflecting on my childhood, I recall a time when my brother and I would happily follow our parents’ lead, no questions asked. Whether it was a drive to a mediocre pizza joint or a casual dinner at a local barbecue spot, we just went along for the ride. As kids growing up in Southern California, our dining experiences were often limited to places like “Tony’s Pizzeria” (where the pizza was more cardboard than culinary delight) or “Charlie’s BBQ” (as basic as it sounds). Occasionally, we’d treat ourselves to Sizzler, where the allure of an all-you-can-eat buffet was hard to resist.
Our family vacations were modest yet memorable, primarily consisting of car trips to popular destinations within a five-hour radius of home. If you’re familiar with the West Coast, you’d recognize names like Las Vegas, San Diego, Santa Barbara, Palm Springs, and even some less glamorous spots in Mexico. Honestly, I might not remember these trips at all if it weren’t for the photos that prove we actually went.
When I became a parent, I vowed that my wife and I would provide our children with better experiences—more extravagant vacations, dining at upscale restaurants, and exciting entertainment options. However, as our oldest approaches high school and our youngest is in fourth grade, I’m beginning to realize that these grand plans often lead to headaches. Instead of unrestrained excitement when we share our travel itineraries, we’re met with a barrage of questions: “What’s the hotel like?” and “Can we go somewhere else instead?”
As I’m penning this from a hotel room during our end-of-summer trip to Montreal—a delightful five-and-a-half-hour drive from our home in Connecticut—I can hear the complaints from my kids about how much quicker we could have arrived by flying. While I felt a surge of frustration, I found myself defending our choice to drive for both time and financial reasons. Thankfully, the charm of being in a foreign country seemed to win them over once we arrived at our hotel.
Despite being in this vibrant city, my thoughts turn to how I can get my kids to agree on just one activity during our five-day stay without the usual pushback. It’s the same story with dining choices; whether it’s lunch, dinner, or even a movie night, there’s always a debate. Having moved to Southern Connecticut, just a stone’s throw from New York City—known for its incredible and pricey dining options—our children have dined at more five-star restaurants by age five than I had in my entire college career. While I know they appreciate these culinary experiences, it doesn’t stop the endless bickering over where to eat on any given night.
I genuinely cherish the multitude of amazing experiences our kids have had, yet I can’t seem to figure out how to instill in them the idea that sometimes, they need to just go along for the ride and trust our parental judgment. Perhaps a visit to a no-frills diner next time we’re in Los Angeles will deliver the lesson I’m seeking.
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In summary, while we strive to provide our children with enriching experiences, it can be a challenge to get them to embrace spontaneity and trust our decisions. Perhaps a nostalgic trip to a local diner will remind them of the joy in simply going along for the ride.