“Goodnight, honey!”
“‘Night!” I wave from the couch, enjoying the sweet escape of Netflix during this phase of parenthood. Having tweens comes with its challenges, but one of the best perks is that they can tuck themselves in and sleep through the night. Finally!
So when I turned 40, I didn’t dwell on the emerging wrinkles or sagging skin. Instead, I told myself, “It’s time to reclaim my sleep and catch up on years of being a sleep-deprived parent.”
One night, after kissing my husband goodnight, I rolled over, anticipating a long stretch of restful slumber—until I heard it.
“Znnnh…”
What in the world was that?
“Babe? Did you say something?” Silence. My husband has a remarkable talent for falling asleep the moment his head hits the pillow. I tried to drift off, but moments later, the sound returned, a strange choking noise emanating from his nostrils: “Znh!”
Oh no, he didn’t! Ever the concerned spouse, I gently nudged him. He jolted awake as if I’d poked him with a fork. “What?”
“Roll over! You’re snoring!” I whispered, teeth clenched.
And that’s how my newfound sleep interruptions began. Initially, it was a rare occurrence—maybe once a week. Now, it’s a nightly ordeal. I’ve always needed two things to fall asleep: darkness and silence. So this new auditory invasion was a significant problem. Seriously? I had just achieved the holy grail of parenthood—sleeping through the night—and now my husband was the culprit keeping me awake? Unbelievable.
I declared, “It was nice knowing you, but we may need separate bedrooms from now on.”
“Oh, really? Should we just get separate houses while we’re at it?” he replied sarcastically.
“Sure! Can I have the bigger one? You can have the shed out back and come over for visits!”
When we shared our grand idea of separate rooms with others, they found it more concerning than humorous (sorry, Mom!). But in reality, we’re not alone in this snoring struggle. Just mention “snoring” to any couple, and you’ll have them pointing fingers faster than if you asked who’s worse at washing dishes. Many are resorting to separate bedrooms, couches, or even their kids’ rooms, using “bonding time” as a cover for getting some much-needed rest!
For now, we’ve found a temporary fix. My evening routine involves setting my alarm, charging my phone, and then… plugging in my ears. I found earplugs that muffle my husband’s snoring but still let me hear important sounds, like tornado warnings or a kid’s sudden illness.
I consider myself lucky: my husband is slim, and his snoring is more akin to a chainsaw cutting small branches than a lumberjack felling trees. I’ve had the misfortune of sharing a room with larger individuals who suffer from sleep apnea, and let me tell you, it’s brutal. Those folks sound like they’re trying to demolish an entire forest when they fall asleep.
Anyone dealing with this issue knows it’s no joke. Sleep deprivation can seriously impact your performance, akin to being under the influence of alcohol. Plus, those who snore heavily may not receive enough oxygen at night, leading to fatigue and irritability. There are sleep clinics that can diagnose sleep apnea, so clears throat ask your doctor if this might be right for you or a loved one. And if you can’t convince your snoring partner to seek help, several over-the-counter remedies can be discreetly placed on their nightstand. (P.S. Offering them incentives if they use them can be a fun way to encourage compliance!)
For the record, my husband claims that I snore too, but I call shenanigans—I’ve never heard it myself.
If you’re interested in exploring fertility options, check out our post about the at-home insemination kit. You might also want to learn more about the intracervical insemination syringe kit for a more tailored approach. For a comprehensive overview of pregnancy and home insemination, the NHS offers excellent resources.
In summary, snoring can disrupt even the most well-earned sleep, leading couples to seek creative solutions. Whether it’s earplugs, separate rooms, or even a little humor, the struggle is real.
Keyphrase: snoring solutions for couples
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