I adore my children. Truly, I do. Our moments together are precious, and they bring so much joy to my life. However, occasionally, I feel the overwhelming need for a break from all that joy. We’ve got a fantastic babysitter for date nights (remember those?), but she’s perpetually booked and charges $15 an hour. Planning for a longer stint with her often requires a significant budget and a GoFundMe page. So, when fate aligns and both of my kids get invited to a sleepover on the same night, it feels like a miracle. Cue the happy dance! It’s a rare win in parenting.
But let’s be honest: my excitement is often short-lived because my kids are not great at sleepovers. Don’t let them hear me say that, but it’s true. They excel at overnight stays with their grandparents, who shower them with gifts and cuddles, but when it comes to friends, it’s a different story. They’re way too old to struggle like this, yet they inevitably call home late at night. First, the texts begin to arrive, perfectly timed as if they can sense how happy we are.
Typically, we’re in the middle of a delightful dinner, sipping wine, laughing with friends at a nice restaurant—oh, how I miss those tablecloths! Or we’re enjoying a grown-up movie filled with humor. Then, out of nowhere, the texts start flowing in, disrupting our precious adult time.
Here’s how it unfolds; they get invited to a sleepover, begging us with their “please, please, this time will be different!” We fall for it every time. Excited, I pack them up and drop them off, watching as they dash into the house without even a backward glance. Yay! I chat with the host parents, grateful for their hospitality, and flee their driveway in a hurry. Freedom at last! What should we do first? A trendy Thai restaurant? A trip to Ikea? Perhaps engage in some adult fun, minus the details.
But then, as night falls, it begins:
IGNORE. DO NOT RESPOND TO THE SAD EMOJI. IT’S A TRAP. SHE IS FINE. THERE IS NO TUMMY ACHING.
It’s tough to text back when your hands are slick with oils, or so I’ve heard. I manage a few quick replies, feeling guilty and asking her what she ate, suggesting she drink some water. Then I say goodnight. The tummy ache is likely just a ruse because soon she switches tactics.
And heaven forbid there’s a slumber party with multiple girls involved. That’s a recipe for drama. My sweet child would never be the source of conflict; it’s always those other girls. I’m convinced a gathering of girls at a slumber party should be called a “tweenwreck.”
This isn’t just a girl thing, either. My son gets in on the action with his unique excuses. “I forgot my charger.” “I have a mysterious rash.”
IGNORE. DON’T ENGAGE.
His creativity often leads to us caving in. Eventually, one of us (typically my partner) suits up and makes the trek to rescue our child, apologizing profusely to the sleepy parents. Sorry for our kids ruining your night, groggy parents.
In front of the kids, we feign nonchalance, saying, “It’s not a big deal…” but inside, we’re screaming. We assure them they can always call or text if they feel uncomfortable—understanding how frustrating it is when they do, but trying to keep calm. For now, we’ve decided on “almost sleepovers,” which are late-night playdates with a strict 9:30 p.m. pickup. Real sleepovers are on hold until further notice, even though they keep asking. We’ve had heart-to-heart talks about what might help them feel comfortable, but they seem indifferent.
Maybe they don’t really suck at sleepovers; perhaps they’re just not ready yet. Maybe they’ve concluded that home is where they truly belong. It’s hard to be upset about that.
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Summary
Kids often struggle with sleepovers due to anxiety, perhaps feeling more comfortable at home. Despite being excited about these social events, they frequently call home, leading to the cancellation of sleepovers. Parents try to navigate these situations with understanding while longing for some adult time. The article humorously addresses the challenges parents face and suggests a temporary solution of late-night playdates instead of traditional sleepovers.
Keyphrase: Why Kids Struggle with Sleepovers
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