In today’s parenting landscape, concepts like free-range parenting and slow parenting are all the rage. There’s a lot of buzz about recreating the carefree summers of the ’70s, and this trend often leads us to question our own choices, making us wonder if we’re overly involved in our kids’ lives.
Last summer, I penned a piece about sending my son to sleepaway camp for a full seven weeks. It was meant to be a light-hearted exploration of my anxieties about his first extended time away from home. While some readers appreciated my perspective, others expressed their disapproval. I was taken aback by the judgmental comments from other parents: “You must be out of your mind!” “You’ll never get this time back!” “How could anyone possibly send their kids away for two months?” “That’s just wrong! Summer is for families to bond.” The underlying message was clear: they assumed I was eager for a stress-free summer. In reality, the decision to send him to camp was fraught with concern and worry.
Both my husband and I work full-time. Sure, I appreciate ideas like “morning chores followed by family beach trips,” but that’s only feasible during the scant week of vacation I can snag in the summer. Could I have quit my job and homeschooled my kids for a season of unrestricted play? Yes, but I didn’t. So, let’s ease off, shall we?
My son thrives on activity. He requires constant engagement—think playing catch and being on the go 24/7. Unstructured time doesn’t suit him. Could I have enrolled him in sports camps for the entire summer? Absolutely. But moving to a commune? Not on my agenda.
Independence is crucial for my son. He needed to discover how to interact with peers, express himself, and make choices without me hovering and saying “slow down” or “watch out.” Yes, I could have pursued other methods to foster his independence, but I didn’t. So let’s not judge my decisions.
Living in a bustling city means my son doesn’t have the luxury of exploring nature on his own. He can’t just wander into the woods or lie in a field gazing at stars. Sure, I could have taken him camping on weekends, but after seeing The Blair Witch Project, that idea was a hard pass. So again, get off my jock.
Moreover, my son needed a break from screens. He spent two months without a phone, tablet, or TV. Could I have enforced a no-electronics rule at home? Yes, but I didn’t. So let’s cut the criticism.
What I’ve outlined here is all about my son’s specific needs. They may not align with your child’s, and that’s perfectly okay. Our family dynamics are different from yours. Like any parent, I strive to make decisions that are best for my child. For him, a structured summer away from home was the right choice, and it paid off—he had an incredible summer.
He swam in a lake daily and even camped in teepees. My son went from being a reserved, cautious kid to one full of confidence and joy. Before long, I was seeing photos of him playing soccer in the rain, muddy and ecstatic, celebrating victories with new friends. He painted his face for color war and led chants in the dining hall until he lost his voice. His resilience grew, and he learned to approach new kids for pickup games of basketball. He had the freedom to explore in a safe environment, allowing him to flourish.
Families have unique circumstances influenced by finances, work commitments, and their children’s personalities. Let’s stop the judgment about parenting styles and embrace the fact that every child is different, and so are the choices we make about their summers. For us, that meant sleepaway camp, and we’ll be doing it again this year.
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In summary, each family must navigate their own path based on individual needs and circumstances, and for us, sending our son to sleepaway camp was the right decision.
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