I Might Be Petite, But Don’t You Dare Call Me Adorable

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“Honestly,” she said casually, “he mentioned, ‘Sam’s alright, but she’s just too tiny.’”

I was taken aback, and all I could do was shrug, nod, and admit, “That’s right, I am.”

From a young age, I was the smallest child in my class, but this was the first moment I realized my height could be perceived as a defining characteristic. Until that chat with Lisa, I had a plethora of words to describe myself: intelligent, humorous, dependable, skilled. Yet, after that day, the first label that sprang to mind was “short.”

For reference, I stand at 4 feet 9 inches tall. Now at 43, I like to think I’ve progressed since my fourth-grade experiences, yet being short is a constant reminder in many ways. Hooks are always positioned too high. In movie theaters, I find myself craning my neck around others to see the screen. Riding the subway during a hot summer day means I’m at armpit level with fellow passengers.

Stranger Remarks

Then there are the remarks from strangers:

  • “You’re the smallest person I’ve ever seen!”
  • “How tall are you?”
  • “I’ve never met anyone shorter!”

These comments frustrate me the most. I’d never dream of saying something like that to someone else, but perhaps that’s because I haven’t had the chance.

Over the years, I’ve developed a repertoire of clever comebacks that I seldom use. Mostly, I want to ask these individuals, “Do you think I haven’t heard this before? Do you think I’m oblivious to my height?”

Growing Up Short

In the years after my chat with Lisa, I learned all too well what it meant to be diminutive. As a teenager, it meant being perceived as sweet and adorable, but also un-dateable—everyone’s little sister. I grew accustomed to people resting their elbows on my head and saying, “You’re a great armrest!” At parties, I often stood in the corner, hoping someone would ask me to dance, but feeling terrified that if they did, I’d look ridiculous reaching up for a guy’s shoulders. I tottered around in heels, knowing I wasn’t fooling anyone.

Underneath my senior picture in the high school yearbook, I insisted, “Don’t call me adorable!” While cute might sound complimentary, it felt like a label everyone imposed on me, and I was growing claustrophobic.

A New Beginning

I ventured out of state for college, starting fresh without knowing anyone, and there, I worked hard to dismantle the stereotypes tied to my petite stature. I lifted weights and learned to throw a punch. I became vocal and politically engaged. I refused to be condescended to.

During graduation, I received recognition for a prestigious fellowship. When the college president announced my name, I stood up, and suddenly everyone was looking around, trying to spot me because, when I stood, I was the same height as all those seated. A guy beside me whispered, “Stand on a chair so they can see you!” “Not a chance,” I replied with a grin, settling back into my seat with a flush of embarrassment.

Family Understanding

I used to vent to my mother about the struggles of being short. She understands; she’s only 4 feet 10 inches tall. At 72, she still deals with people patting her on the head and calling her adorable. (And let me tell you, if you think that’s a compliment, you’re mistaken.) However, she’s become more at ease with her height, and I have too. I remind myself that shorter individuals often excel at yoga balance poses due to our lower center of gravity. I can stretch out my legs on airplanes, and when someone calls me cute, I try to smile graciously, remembering they likely mean well.

Acceptance and Love

Maybe it’s the wisdom that comes with age, but acceptance has become much simpler now. Throughout my childhood, I fought against my height while simultaneously defining myself by it. It’s exhausting to be at odds with oneself. Our bodies are not merely vessels; they are how we interact with the world and discover who we are. If we dislike our bodies, how can we ever truly love ourselves?

I married a man who is 5 feet 9 inches tall—an entire foot taller than me! I must admit, I love having someone around who can reach the high shelves without needing a step stool. Occasionally, I stand on a chair to match his eye level and gaze around the room. I remember my college graduation, feeling invisible on the floor; it was as if standing on that chair would only scream my difference. In my dreams, I climb up and wave, and people notice me, cheering and applauding.

Now, while standing on a chair in my kitchen, I wrap my arm around my husband’s shoulders. He might never have fallen for me if I were taller because then I wouldn’t be me.

“Wow,” I say. “So this is how you see the world.”

Resources for Understanding Fertility

In the quest for understanding fertility, a fantastic resource is WomensHealth.gov where you can explore pregnancy and home insemination information. If you’re curious about at-home insemination options, check out Cryobaby for helpful insights, or explore the BabyMaker kit, an authority in the field.

Conclusion

In summary, embracing my petite stature has been a journey of self-acceptance and resilience. While I once allowed my height to define me negatively, I’ve learned to appreciate the unique perspectives and experiences that come with being short.

Keyphrase: petite stature acceptance

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