Recently, I had a fascinating conversation with my friend, Tom, who encouraged me to explore meditation. His enlightening book, Finding Peace: How I Conquered the Inner Critic, Reduced Stress, and Discovered Effective Self-Help Strategies, will be available next month. Tom has spent considerable time examining the link between our habits and overall happiness, so I was eager to gain insights from him.
When asked about a simple habit that consistently boosts happiness, I never thought I’d say this, but my answer is… meditation. Previously, I believed meditation was reserved for those in flowing robes or fans of new age music. However, scientific studies reveal a plethora of health benefits, including lower blood pressure, enhanced immune function, and even rewiring our brains for greater happiness. Plus, it turns out you don’t need to sit cross-legged or burn incense to meditate. If you’re interested, I’ve shared some straightforward meditation techniques.
I began with just five minutes each day and quickly noticed three key benefits:
- Improved focus,
- A heightened sense of calm, and
- A remarkable ability to pull myself out of ruminative thoughts about the past or future, allowing me to engage with the present moment.
Over the past four years, my meditation practice has evolved to 35 minutes a day, and a significant benefit emerged: I developed a healthier relationship with the voice inside my head. You know the one—the voice that leads us to snack when we’re not hungry, distracts us during conversations, and causes us to lose our tempers only to regret it later. Cultivating the ability to observe our thoughts without reacting impulsively—often referred to as mindfulness—is a transformative skill.
I’m not claiming that meditation is a cure-all; I still engage in my fair share of foolishness, as my partner can attest. However, I can confidently say that this practice has made me happier, more composed, and kinder. In fact, I was motivated to write a book aimed at making meditation appealing to those who might not identify with traditional practitioners, titled Finding Peace.
Reflecting on what I know now about establishing healthy habits compared to when I was 18, I admit I had little understanding of habit theory back then. A neuroscientist once shared with me, “The brain is designed to seek pleasure.” Generally, we gravitate towards what feels good. What I’ve learned is that I often struggle to form or break habits unless there’s a strong personal incentive—meaning I need to feel good about the change, either directly or indirectly.
For instance, my interest in meditation was sparked by compelling research highlighting its benefits, and I’ve continued the practice because, although it can be challenging, the positive effects in my daily life are undeniable.
Unfortunately, I also have habits that hinder my happiness, such as multitasking and mindless eating. Despite knowing that our brains can’t effectively handle multiple tasks at once, I find myself juggling emails, social media, and actual work. Additionally, I love indulging in pasta and cookies, and when I lose control, it often leads to regret.
Meditation should help address these challenges since it encourages us to focus on the present. Yet, I still find myself struggling with these distractions. Beyond meditation, exercise is another crucial habit that enhances my happiness. If I don’t stay active, I feel restless, prompting my partner to encourage me to go for a run when I become antsy.
I did manage to break an unhealthy habit in my early thirties. After covering conflicts overseas, I found myself battling depression and resorting to self-medication with drugs. This ultimately led to a panic attack during a live broadcast—an alarming wake-up call that prompted me to quit drugs immediately, motivated primarily by the need to protect my career.
Traveling for work often complicates my ability to maintain healthy habits. During intense news coverage, I find it challenging to meditate or exercise, and the stress can amplify my inner critic. Yet, despite these challenges, I love my job, which complicates the balance between work and well-being.
Interestingly, I experienced a significant shift in my habits during the summer after graduating high school. While driving, I made a sudden decision to apply myself academically, which led to a successful college experience. Although this achievement hasn’t impacted my career directly, the motivation to work hard has been enduring. However, it also contributed to my reckless behavior during my career, leading me to neglect my mental health. Meditation has since helped me find equilibrium between ambition and well-being.
My partner has had a profound influence on my habits. We often motivate each other towards healthier choices. For example, she practices compassion, which inspired me to adopt a kinder demeanor. I used to be curt with service workers, but through compassion meditation, I learned to be more considerate and understanding.
Meditation is a powerful tool that promotes mental fitness, revealing that we can reshape our personalities and behaviors. It’s reminiscent of a sign I once saw in a record store: “All dates can change. So can you.”
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In summary, meditation has transformed my relationship with my inner dialogue, helping me cultivate mindfulness and a kinder disposition. While I still face challenges, the practice has undoubtedly enhanced my overall happiness.
Keyphrase: meditation and self-awareness
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