I want to start by saying how deeply sorry I am for the way things have turned out. I carry the weight of guilt for tearing apart our family and disrupting your world. While I believe that this decision is ultimately for the best, I know, as you’ve expressed, that you would prefer an imperfect togetherness over a peaceful separation. You don’t understand that I was merely existing before, and now you have a mother who can truly breathe and thrive, even if it means living apart. For that, I am truly sorry.
I apologize for the constant back-and-forth between two homes. Just the thought of packing for a weekend brings on stress as I gather clothes, gadgets, and personal items. You, on the other hand, navigate this routine without complaint, even when it means leaving behind something you need. I created this situation, and I regret the exhaustion it brings you—having to transition from one car to another, one house to the next.
I’m also sorry for the strange and awkward reality of seeing your dad and me with other partners. While it’s important for you to witness healthy relationships, I recognize that it’s not something you want to see right now. It can feel nauseating for kids to see their parents being affectionate with someone else, and I regret putting you in that position.
Even though your dad and I strive to avoid putting you in the middle, you inevitably feel caught in between us. If you have a fantastic day with your dad, it seems to come with the burden of feeling guilty for enjoying that time. On the flip side, when you’re with me, I sense your longing for your dad. You deserve to experience joy without the weight of conflicting loyalties.
I’m truly sorry for the moments of loneliness, especially at bedtime, or when you’re away from one of us during vacations. Telling your friends about having two homes and trying to explain our significant others is a lot to navigate at your age. I regret that every holiday involves splitting time, and even if we try to manage things smoothly, you still end up being the messenger. You’re not a robot; you’re a person who deserves to spend time with both parents freely.
As you lay in bed on your 10th birthday, tears in your eyes, expressing your frustration over only getting one family dinner a year, my heart aches for you. I am filled with sorrow that you must face this reality.
Most of all, I feel a profound sadness because I cannot truly understand what it means to be a child of divorce. I know the sting of feeling left out, the anxiety of tests, and the ache for acceptance. But I don’t know the specific pain that comes from having parents who are no longer together. I empathize and will walk this path alongside you, but I can’t fully grasp the hurt I’ve caused, and I realize that “sorry” doesn’t quite capture my remorse.
Despite all of this, I hope that these challenges will be a minor part of your life’s journey and that you will find smoother paths ahead. Life has its share of difficulties, but within the pain, there are invaluable lessons. You will emerge more compassionate and adaptable, with a worldview that surpasses my own. Seeing your parents as individuals rather than just mom and dad will serve you well in life.
My love for you far outweighs my guilt. I am truly sorry for the difficulties that divorce brings into your lives, but I stand firm in my belief that this path was necessary for all of us.
Yet, I’m still so very sorry.
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Summary
This heartfelt apology expresses deep remorse for the impact of divorce on children, acknowledging the challenges they face, such as constant transitions between homes, the complexities of seeing parents with new partners, and the emotional turmoil that comes with these changes. The author emphasizes love over guilt, hoping for a brighter future for the kids.
Keyphrase: divorce apology to children
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