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A Guide to Identifying Sanctimommies

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ModernFamilyBlog
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Sanctimommy, Noun
A self-satisfied individual who flaunts their parenting choices through veiled comments aimed at highlighting the shortcomings of others.
Synonyms: Know-it-all, Fun-sucker, Pearl Clutcher, Pretentious Parent

Physical Traits

Identifying a Sanctimommy by looks alone is tricky, as their behavior transcends race, gender, and background. However, their distinctive gestures can offer clues:

  1. Raised eyebrows
  2. Puckered lips
  3. Pointing fingers
  4. Audible sighs
  5. Tense body language

Common Environments

Sanctimommies thrive in various settings where they can dispense unsolicited advice and showcase their perceived superiority. Watch out for them in:

  1. Parks
  2. Playgroups
  3. Grocery stores
  4. Target (both the parking lot and aisles)
  5. Parenting forums (especially humor sites with comment sections)
  6. Social media platforms like Facebook
  7. Daycare facilities
  8. Schools (notably during drop-off, pick-up, recitals, or open houses)
  9. Birthday parties

Social Dynamics

These individuals are often at the center of social gatherings, monopolizing discussions and redirecting almost any topic to their parenting prowess. Here are five common phrases that exemplify their behavior:

  1. You should feel SO GRATEFUL.
  2. MY kids would NEVER do that.
  3. I didn’t even bother with that article; it’s just too silly.
  4. I’ve never had that issue, that’s ridiculous.
  5. Ugh. This is ridiculous.

Trigger Topics

Certain subjects can provoke Sanctimommies to assert their parenting philosophies and criticize others. These include:

  1. Any online parenting discussions
  2. Conversations about vaccines, organic food, screen time, or sleep training
  3. Mentioning the challenges of parenting
  4. Hiring help, like a babysitter
  5. Nostalgia for life before kids
  6. Expressing that you don’t always feel SO GRATEFUL
  7. Suggesting a need for wine at 2 p.m.
  8. Having a light-hearted approach to parenting
  9. Parenting without a well-documented philosophy
  10. Sharing humorous parenting e-cards on social media

CAUTION

Approaching a Sanctimommy can be risky. While they pose no physical threat, their reactions can be unpredictable when their views are challenged. Look out for signs such as self-pitying behavior, preaching, excessive use of ALL CAPS, citing irrelevant celebrity endorsements, or dismissing the topic as trivial.

This piece was originally published on May 4, 2014.

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In summary, Sanctimommies are easily recognizable by their behavior rather than their appearance, often found in social settings where they dominate conversations. Their tendency to share unsolicited advice can stem from various parenting topics, and caution is advised when engaging with them.

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