The old adage rings true: becoming a parent changes everything. While I had heard this countless times, I never fully grasped it until I experienced it firsthand. From my wardrobe to my personal grooming, my entire lifestyle has shifted dramatically since having children. Now, I categorize my life as BK (before kids) or AK (after kids).
- Bathroom Breaks: Before kids, using the bathroom was a private affair. After kids, it’s like a contact sport. I’ve become a master at navigating the restroom while a small child clings to my legs, demanding attention.
- Drinks Out: In my pre-kid days, three cocktails felt just right—enough to enjoy without going overboard. Now, if I ever make it out, I limit myself to one drink. Any more and I’m facing a night of frequent bathroom trips and a hangover that feels like I had ten drinks.
- Brunch Timing: Back then, brunch didn’t kick off until 11am. Today? Lunch is served at 11am sharp.
- Sleep Patterns: I used to relish my sleep schedule, knowing weekends meant late mornings. Now, weekends are just as early as weekdays, and we get even less downtime since school is out.
- Dining Choices: Previously, restaurant selection was based solely on food cravings. Now, it’s all about family-friendly menus and early opening hours.
- Eating Habits: I used to savor meals when hunger struck, enjoying every bite. Now, meals are a race against time; I often finish my son’s leftovers and grab whatever I can while the baby allows.
- Romantic Gestures: In the past, romance was defined by wine, intimate dinners, and fancy lingerie. Now, the most romantic act is simply tackling the dishes together.
- Birthday Celebrations: Before kids, birthday parties were all about fun with friends and overpriced drinks. Now, I find myself socializing primarily with the parents of my child’s friends at these events.
- Public Exposure: Rarely did I expose my chest in public before kids. Now, I’ve become accustomed to breastfeeding in public, and I know all my friends’ nursing journeys well. Though I use a cover, it’s surprising how motherhood has shifted my perception of modesty.
- Night Out Timing: I used to leave the house after 9pm for a night out. Now, I’m happily tucked in by that hour.
- Hair Color Goals: Before, changing my hair color was about style. Now, it’s about hiding those pesky grays.
- Hair Styles: I once asked my stylist for trendy cuts. Now, I simply request a length that allows for a quick ponytail.
- Wardrobe Sizes: I had three distinct clothing sizes: slim, average, and plus. Now, my wardrobe contains “normal” (my old plus size), maternity transition pieces, and full maternity gear. I’ve also embraced the elastic waistband—who needs buttons anymore?
- Location Choices: I used to prioritize living near nightlife. Now, the school district is the deciding factor.
- Home Decor: My pre-kid apartment showcased travel souvenirs and artsy prints. Now, it’s dominated by plastic toys and my preschooler’s artwork.
- Bulk Buying: I never understood the need for bulk purchases before kids. Today, essentials like paper towels and cheese sticks are always stocked in my home.
- Neighborhood Parties: If my neighbors hosted a late-night gathering, I’d join in the fun. Now, I’m the one calling the cops if things get too loud.
- Sickness: Being ill used to mean lounging with comfort food and TV. Now, I’m expected to tend to the kids even while feeling awful—no sick days for moms!
For those of you considering starting a family, you might find helpful resources at Make a Mom or explore more about insemination options at NHS, an excellent guide for pregnancy and home insemination.
In summary, life after kids is a whirlwind of changes that reshape your routines, choices, and even your identity. From how you eat to how you socialize, the transition from BK to AK is profound and often humorous.
Keyphrase: Life After Kids
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