Yesterday, I found myself coaching a swim meet alongside three other coaches from my team. One of them was a hip college babysitter named Alex, and the other was a dad of three, Mike, who’s around my age. While we were on the deck, Alex, who’s 22, posed an intriguing question to us: “What would you say is the percentage of parenting that is just plain awful?”
After a moment of consideration, I replied, “At least 70%.” Mike chimed in with, “But definitely not more than 97.5%.” Alex then said, “Wow, I thought I wanted kids, but now I’m not so sure.” Without missing a beat, Mike and I fell into the familiar routine of defending the joys of parenting—the obligatory speech about how that 30-2.5% of goodness makes it all worthwhile.
But upon reflecting last night, I realized I need to be more precise: parenting is an endurance challenge—a super ultra marathon with no finish line. It’s a physically, mentally, and emotionally taxing experience. There are mornings when the countdown to bedtime begins even before the kids are awake. Some days, 97.5% of parenting feels like a struggle. In fact, there are days when 99.9% of it is just plain hard.
Consider the nights when your little one screams without ceasing for the seventeenth time in a row. Or when your toddler decides that the mudroom floor is a canvas for their artistic expression after a diaper change gone wrong. And let’s not forget that moment ten minutes into your gym workout when the babysitter comes to retrieve you because your child has been wailing the entire time. Yes, parenting can be tough.
Like that time you had a bit too much wine the night before, only to be jolted awake by an early-rising kid who refuses to go back to sleep. Or when you’re attempting to write a blog post, and one child is trying to yank the mouse off the cord while another is using an action figure to smash every key on the keyboard. And when your teenager looks you in the eye and says something hurtful, or when your kid is bullied at school and you feel powerless to help.
Then there are the moments of sheer emotional turmoil—like when your child is heartbroken over a relationship with someone who clearly doesn’t deserve them. Or when anxiety grips your child, and you feel helpless as they cling to rituals that they believe will keep them safe. There are days when you lose your patience and yell at your kids, feeling like a complete failure afterward.
When your little one defiantly smiles and ignores your request to stop what they’re doing, or when your kids can’t seem to resist touching each other in the car no matter how far apart you seat them, it can be frustrating. Or those times when your teen is late coming home, and you’re left worrying.
And let’s not overlook the chaos—losing yet another pair of goggles, having DVDs jammed in the player, or your child pulling a stunt that leaves you questioning your sanity. Or that moment when, after weeks of little intimacy, you and your partner finally get a moment alone, only to be interrupted by a child’s cough that sounds like a scene from a horror movie.
On particularly intense days, it can feel like you’re nearing that 99.9% threshold of suckage. But even amidst the chaos, there’s that tiny 0.1% that makes it all worthwhile. That sweet kiss, holding their hand for just a moment, watching them sleep peacefully, or seeing the pride on their face after an accomplishment.
Experiencing life through their innocent eyes, those unprompted “I love you, Mommy” moments, or a heartfelt “Thanks, Mom”—these are the instances that make you forget the struggles. Yes, the challenging days may outnumber the good ones, but they can never overshadow them entirely. And that’s what makes the journey of parenting so fulfilling.
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Summary:
Parenting is often a grueling endurance test, with at least 70% of the experience being challenging. From sleepless nights to emotional turmoil, the struggles can feel overwhelming. Yet, amidst the chaos, the small joys—like a child’s kiss or a heartfelt “I love you”—make it all worthwhile.
Keyphrase: Parenting Challenges
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