Here’s a little secret as we approach Mother’s Day: Motherhood is tough. I always dreamed of having children, but I never imagined being cooped up at home, drenched in various bodily fluids, perpetually exhausted, and trying to enjoy arts and crafts at the kitchen table while chaos reigns around me. It often feels like I’m strumming a violin poorly while everything crumbles around me.
I could claim it’s rewarding, but that would be a lie. There isn’t a single trophy for motherhood; it’s all about survival. At this point, you might be either shocked and ready to write me a rebuttal extolling the virtues of motherhood, or you might be nodding so vigorously that you’ll need a neck brace.
Motherhood resembles launching a startup without a clear product idea. You’re creating the products on the fly, testing out new parenting strategies every few minutes, and trying to make it through toddlerhood while critics assess your performance based on a snippet they witnessed during a particularly tough trip to the store. Just like in business, the chances of failure are high—and I’ve certainly mastered that art. #Winning!
When I say motherhood is challenging, I don’t mean I don’t adore my kids or that I wouldn’t do anything for them—even defend them with my life. My kids are aware of this, believe me. Amid the chaos, there are those rare, blissful moments of quiet when no one is arguing or racing against the clock. Those moments are sacred between my children and me, and frankly, it’s nobody else’s business.
I thrive on external validation: accolades, promotions, and recognition for a job well done. I love the structure of a workplace—annual reviews? Yes, please! Comments on my latest blog? Now we’re talking! I crave adult conversations that don’t revolve around incessant “whys,” slamming doors, or tears. I need to be acknowledged for more than just packing lunches or keeping track of school assignments. I didn’t sign up for this exhausting gig.
I always imagined having children I could travel the world with, shaping their minds, sharing wisdom, and fostering future leaders. I recall many fond memories from my childhood, but I also cherish the adult friendships I have with my parents. The best part of my past work experiences was the vibrant corporate culture. It seems that the “corporate” culture of motherhood leaves a lot to be desired. Or perhaps my “team” isn’t old enough for performance reviews yet. My ideal vision of motherhood appears to be paved with sleepless nights, heaps of laundry, the challenges of puberty, and sometimes, ungrateful kids. There are no awards for motherhood—only the daily grind of survival.
So here I am, navigating this journey with the hope that the odds will be in my favor.
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