Back in high school, I enrolled in a Sociology class, where our major projects revolved around two significant life events: marriage and parenthood. My classmates and I paired off, planned mock weddings, and even donned white dresses and veils for a pretend ceremony in the auditorium. One of the highlights? The young, charming teacher who played my father and walked me down the aisle, someone who had captured the hearts of many female seniors.
As part of our preparation, we engaged in role-playing scenarios involving conflict and negotiation. Leading up to the faux wedding, my pretend husband—my buddy Alex—had to persuade my “father” to let me tie the knot. Though it was a playful exercise, it offered a mere glimpse into the complexities of real marriage. Factors like your partner’s personality, finances, and in-laws create a unique puzzle with endless combinations.
The next phase of our project involved having a baby. We received a 10-pound bag of flour, which we named “Olivia” (after my favorite character on a popular TV show). The rules were strict: no leaving it in lockers, no putting it down, and we had to take turns caring for it. It was meant to mimic the responsibilities of real parenting.
Now that I have a child of my own, I realize that the flour sack was only a fraction of what parenting entails. However, I can think of several classes in school that better prepared me for the role of a parent:
- DRAMA: Mastering the art of performance is crucial in parenting. Whether it’s putting on silly voices or pretending to be angry while chuckling inside, acting is essential. I can embody a horse, a pig, or even Wonder Woman, and bonus points for singing in a frog voice!
- DEBATE/NEGOTIATION:
“It’s bedtime.”
“Why?”
“Because you need to rest.”
“Why?”
“Because you’re three.”
“Why?”
“Because I said so.”
“Can we read one more book first?”
“Just get into bed.” - ALGEBRA: If x represents the hours until I’m awakened by a toddler and y represents the sleep I need, then y-x equals NOT ENOUGH HOURS IN THE DAY.
- CHEMISTRY: Consider this equation: one newborn (NB), one hormonal new mother (HNM), multiplied by postpartum anxiety, plus one relatively sane husband (RSH). What’s the result? I’m still figuring that out; the mixture is bubbling away.
- MUSIC APPRECIATION/BAND: You know those cringe-worthy school concerts where fifth graders struggle to play the theme to Mickey Mouse? That experience equips you to handle any cacophony your child might produce on their instrument.
- PHYSICAL EDUCATION: While I may have spent more time daydreaming in the field hockey backfield, I did learn how to make the most out of any situation—an invaluable skill when parenting.
- HOME ECONOMICS: Ah, home ec! Although I still can’t sew for the life of me (thanks to the memory of my hideous pink sweatpants), I can whip up a full meal from appetizers to dessert using a roll of Pillsbury biscuits.
So, thank you, Elkhart Memorial High School! Turns out, I was paying attention after all. For those exploring the journey of parenthood, if you’re looking for more information on home insemination, check out Make a Mom’s guide.
In summary, the high school experience, from drama to home ec, equipped me with unexpected skills that make the wild ride of parenthood just a bit more manageable. Whether you’re facing bedtime negotiations or navigating the chaos of family life, the lessons learned in those classrooms continue to resonate today. And for further insights on pregnancy, Healthline is a fantastic resource to explore.
Keyphrase: parenting lessons from high school
Tags: “home insemination kit”, “home insemination syringe”, “self insemination”
