In the NRA’s reimagining of beloved fairy tales, the premise is simple: the more firearms, the safer we are. Why not infuse classic stories with this ideology? For instance, had Little Red Riding Hood been armed, the Big Bad Wolf would never have dared to threaten her grandmother. Similarly, Hansel and Gretel transform from innocent children into armed hunters, flipping the narrative to make them the protagonists.
Amelia Brooks, who labels herself a “patriot and writer,” crafted these peculiar adaptations for the NRA Family website, creating a blend of tedium and horror. Little Red Riding Hood is now titled Little Red Riding Hood (Has A Gun), while Hansel and Gretel becomes Hansel and Gretel (Have Guns). The editor’s note provocatively questions, “What if these fairy tale characters had been trained in gun safety and proficiency?”
The NRA Family website—yes, that exists—features a logo that could stir discomfort in any parent. While many of us have fond memories of fairy tales at bedtime, the NRA’s versions take a grim turn. In their rendition of Little Red Riding Hood, the titular character ventures into the woods armed with a rifle. Upon encountering the wolf, his predatory demeanor vanishes at the sight of her firearm. When he arrives at grandma’s house first, she fortifies herself with a shotgun to fend off danger. Together, they subdue the wolf, who is carted off by a huntsman, leaving Red and her grandmother feeling secure, knowing they can protect themselves.
In the case of Hansel and Gretel, they are no longer mere victims of their evil stepmother but instead portrayed as resourceful tweens on a hunting expedition. When they discover a witch’s candy cottage, the story takes a bizarre twist as they encounter two trapped children. Armed and cautious, they unlock the cage and prepare for confrontation. The narrative abruptly shifts from a tale of survival to one of hunting and retribution against the witch, entirely transforming the original story.
These adaptations may leave the brothers Grimm rolling in their graves. The NRA’s spin on fairy tales reflects a shocking departure from their intended moral lessons.
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In summary, the NRA’s reimagined fairy tales showcase a unique and alarming narrative where firearms play central roles, significantly altering the morals and messages of classic stories. If you’re interested in further exploring the topic of home insemination, be sure to check out the resources linked above.
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